


strange connection

by lunamars (lunnamars)



Category: One Piece
Genre: Angst, Banter, Denial of Feelings, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Mutual Pining, Post-Time Skip, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-24
Updated: 2020-05-19
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:20:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 28,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22878574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lunnamars/pseuds/lunamars
Summary: Occasionally, Zoro would offer pieces of his thoughts and Tashigi always imagined that these conversations were like small wrapped papers spread on a table. Depending on the subject or the mood, he would open a random one and share it with her.
Relationships: Roronoa Zoro & Tashigi, Roronoa Zoro/Tashigi
Comments: 89
Kudos: 71





	1. den den mushi

**Author's Note:**

> And here I go again on my journey of learning to write with yet another zotash story. :)
> 
> An important note is that I quote about the den den mushi that Tashigi gave to Zoro in the DLC The Void Mirror Prototype of the game One Piece: World Seeker. By the way, if you haven’t seen the interactions of these two in this DLC, please go. It's basically a great fanfic! There's a video on youtube that puts together all of their scenes.
> 
> A reminder that English is not my primary language, so please, forgive me for any mistakes. I’m currently searching for a beta-reader though, so have some patience with me, hahaha.
> 
> Once again: everything happens after Punk Hazard, but unrelated to any canonical arc.
> 
> And our daily disclaimer: obviously, I don’t own anything in One Piece because if I did, Luffy and Nami would already be together, as well as Zoro and Tashigi. So, that’s it.

_プルルル purururu  
_

“What do you want, four-eyes?”

Roronoa Zoro answered with a not so friendly voice. He didn’t seem to be asleep, so she must not have hindered him. Perhaps he didn’t want to talk to her? Well, the odds were high. The swordsman always seemed to despise her, but, in a similar way, she never made an effort to show her best side.

 _I don’t know. I guess I just wanted to talk to someone_ , she thought.

“Why did you decide to become a pirate?”

Tashigi was able to notice a little hesitation in his sudden silence. First of all, she was sure he wasn’t expecting a call in the middle of the night; second of all, he didn’t expect it to be a call from her and lastly, wasn’t expecting this question at all. But after the nasty day she had, she just didn’t care.

And it’s not like he cares either.

Since she gave Zoro the den den mushi when they were investigating KAGERO, the girl has been desperately trying to get it back and maybe, find where the crew was hiding. So these somewhat unexpected calls became a routine between them for the past few months.

Smoker had no idea she had given this communication snail and Tashigi hoped it stayed that way. It had been two months since this happened and so far all of her attempts have been unsuccessful — the Strawhats refused to return it and always managed to flee from her sight.

But the only thing she didn’t expect was that the snail would be in possession of the swordsman Roronoa Zoro.

Tashigi believes that this could only have been Nami’s idea. Zoro didn’t look like a person who would like to have a den den mushi near him, much less look like someone who would like to talk to _her_. _Nami always likes to upset Roronoa and there would have no better way_ , she thought. The last time they met, for some reason, Nami and Nico Robin arranged for the pirate to stay close to her all night during a celebration that reminded her very much of what happened at Punk Hazard.

The situation was almost the same again.

Pirates saving the day. The Navy always a step behind. The Strawhat pirates victorious once again. And Tashigi didn’t know what else to do with them. Deep down, she knew that even Smoker had no idea what to do.

Monkey D. Luffy messed up with the whole concept that the world (and she too) had about pirates and their villainy. And consequently, Roronoa Zoro messed up with the whole concept she had about justice and freedom.

_So, today I just wanted to chat as Tashigi and Roronoa._

Tashigi spent the whole evening avoiding that thought at all costs and tried to convince herself that he was the only person who might be available because… it just had been a very bad day and quite frankly, Tashigi didn’t have many people to call a friend.

So what harm would it do to be selfish _just_ for _today_?

“For Luffy.” He answered after a while in silence. The answer was short and firm, leaving no room for any kind of inquiry. But inquiring is what she did.

“ _Mugiwara_?”

“Yes. Look, Captain Four-Eyes, I don’t have that crazy sense of justice and all that prejudice like you have. Things are not always black and white for me, woman. Luffy saved my life and gave me a chance to achieve my goal. In return, I would join him. Simple as that.”

_Crazy sense of justice and all that prejudice, you say…_

“But you used to hunt pirates…" 

"Yes. But Luffy is not just any pirate. I know you know that. Even Smokey knows it. The Navy likes to hunt us and I understand why, but you need to get it out of your head that everyone is the same. I’m sure we did a lot more for people in one year than the Navy did in five.”

Tashigi wanted to yell at him. She wanted to rage and spit in his face how wrong he was, how unfair and prejudiced he was being, but no sound came out.

_Because he is right._

Because she lived all her life seeing black and white. And Vergo’s betrayal simply stained the paper that was her conscience.

Except… what the hell is she doing? How weak is she still to the point of having to depend on a group of misfits to effectively solve problems that the Navy has been trying to solve for years? How much more would this bunch still rub in her face that she was not being able to do her job properly?

She _really_ wanted to yell at him. She wanted to yell at everyone. She wanted to shout at admirals, vice admirals, marines and the like. She wanted to yell at herself and ask why are you so weak _why are you so weak why are you so weak_.

_“The weak don’t get to choose how they die.”_

Trafalgar Law’s words still hurt her to this day. They hurt a lot. It hurt the truth that she was no match for him. It hurt the truth that she was no match for Zoro. It hurt the truth that if it were necessary to battle against either to save some innocent life, she would be defeated and that life could be lost. It hurt the truth that she was weak.

But that pain never stopped Tashigi from moving forward and always pushing herself to exhaustion. Nobody knew how much she trained, how much she studied, how much time she devoted to her own improvement. Just as no one knew how much she cried every time she was unable to win.

How much she cried every time she crossed blades with Roronoa Zoro and lost.

_Always losing._

“I know. You guys are… different. I… have always known. Since Alabasta.”

“Anyway. Did you just call to ask that, woman? If not, I’m already warning you we’re not returning the snail. The witch said it was good to keep it since we don’t have one”.

“That’s not why I called. I just… needed to talk to someone.”

“Haa? And that person had to be me? You didn’t have anyone else?”

_Of course… how silly of me. No one wants to hear you, Tashigi._

“I see. I’m sorry, Roronoa. I didn’t want to bother.” The girl gave an empty laugh and continued. “I’ll call another time to convince you all to return it to me! See you!

"O-oe…”

“Good night.” She didn’t wait for his answer and just hung up. Zoro didn’t return the call either which confirmed her suspicions — she had really bothered him.

_I just wanted to talk a bit…_

Another day on a field mission and yet another failure for the captain’s collection. Another confrontation with pirates that resulted in tragedy and another shitty day for her. The feeling of helplessness is one of the worst, especially if it tends to be your fault.

Tashigi knows that she will always get on her feet every time she falls, but there are times when she finds it incredibly difficult. And at those times, she wished she could have someone to turn to, but … that’s not the case. Or maybe she went to the wrong person.

_Why resort to Roronoa Zoro of all people?_

She didn’t call again for two months.


	2. waves

When Tashigi called again, the field mission had been complicated as usual, but with a different result. She had won, she had been able to protect civilians successfully and the pride she felt of herself filled her chest to the point of overflowing. On those days, she even goes out to celebrate with the crew.

But she was stupidly surprised and furious that a certain green-haired man was the first thing that came to her mind.

Surprised because it was Roronoa Zoro. Furious because it was Roronoa Zoro.

_But ... I wanted to tell him that I won._

So, instead of going out to celebrate the victory, she decided to go back to the base, take a relaxing bath and… who knows, maybe not be annoyed by the infamous pirate.

However, when they finally answered on the other end of the line, she didn't expect Nico Robin's voice.

"Hello, Captain Tashigi. What can I do for you?", the pirate's calm voice still made her feel shivers down her spine since the confrontation at Alabasta.

"N-Nico R-robin! I-I-I just called—"

"To talk to our swordsman?"

The captain suddenly shut up.

_Great. Give your feelings in a silver platter to the clever Nico Robin, Tashigi._

"I'll take the silence as a yes. He's not here at the moment. The den den mushi is always at the little table next to his bed, so when he comes back from the shower, he can call you back. Want to leave a message?"

Tashigi heard no malice in the archaeologist's voice and she seemed genuinely solicitous. But Tashigi was surprised to feel genuinely _uncomfortable_. "Y-Y-You-are in his b-bed?"

"If you stutter more than that, I won't be able to understand you, Captain. But yes, I am. Do you have any problem?"

"N-n-no!!", Tashigi got a little more worked up than she should have.

_I don't know._

"Fufufu. Anyway, I'll have to go now, Captain-san, but I'll let him know. Have a good night!"

_Maybe I won't have it anymore._

"R-Right! G-Good n-night!"

Tashigi hung up but continued to stare at the den den mushi as if he could miraculously explain what she was feeling. Because the captain herself had no idea.

_Nico Robin in the boys' room._

_Nico Robin near the den den mushi that was in the hands of Roronoa._

_In Roronoa's bed._

_What… can that possibly mean?_

Tashigi was convinced that Zoro wouldn't return the call, because, during these past few months, the girl had been the one who initiated any interaction since every week she contacted the crew in order to take the den den mushi back. But deep down… the snail was no longer the main reason.

In the first few weeks, she could easily recite, without stuttering or thinking twice, the reasons why she would call week after week. But over time, Roronoa's baritone voice became a sweet lullaby every time they spoke and Tashigi always slept very well on those nights, but until now she still couldn't understand why.

The only thing that Tashigi was able to realize was the fact that, in the vast majority of situations, she is able to remain calm in the same way that peaceful waves crash in the ocean on a sunny day. But when _his_ voice answers on the other side, for some reason, the waves seem to become uncontrollable and unpredictable.

The captain had also talked to most of the Sunny's crew — Nami, Sanji, the cutest reindeer of all the seas, even Luffy (she remembers that it was one of the funniest conversations she had in her life since the boy didn't have a serious bone in his body) and every time, the waves remained calm.

Perhaps the water has been static because all these times, these people on the other end _were never in his bed_.

_This is none of your concern, Tashigi. Just forget it._

But she couldn't because the girl kept going through all the conversations she had with Zoro through den den mushi until then. There weren't many of them to the point that Tashigi could say she knew him very well as if they were longtime friends, but in general, they were… good. Occasionally, Zoro would offer pieces of his thoughts and Tashigi always imagined that these conversations were like small wrapped papers spread on a table. Depending on the subject or the mood, he would open a random one and share it with her.

However, it wasn't always like that. Initially, the two would just fight with each other through the snail...

_"How the hell do you have such a bad sense of direction, Roronoa? You are so clueless!!"_

_"Haaaa? And you're a pain in the ass, woman!!"_ ,

Or calling each other stupid names...

_"You sword nerd!!"_

_"Marimo."_

_"HAAA? REPEAT THAT, FOUR-EYES!!"_

...or competing for the most foolish things.

_"I am sure that if I throw you in a maze, you will die there because you will never be able to find your way out!!"_

_"Whaat?? You insufferable, are you challenging me??"_

_"My God, you are so thick-headed."_

Until one day, when she passed by Zoro's wanted poster, she had a huge urge to know where he was and what he could be doing. It was so incredibly sudden that Tashigi thought she had been hit by a bolt of lightning because of the shock that ran from her hair to the tip of her toes.

She stopped dead on her tracks. Her heart sped up without warning.

Maybe he was… kicking Sanji? Calling Nami a witch? Giving attention to Chopper? Training? Drinking sake? Sleeping?

Thinking about her?

_No. Impossible. He has said over and over that he hates me._

Even though she knew that, she called him at night on the pretext of trying, once again, to persuade them to return the snail. Zoro just laughed smugly and said no, Tashigi snorted, but after a certain silence, the swordsman asked how her hunts for the Meito swords were going. She was astonished because, judging by the complicated relationship they have, the captain thought the swordsman would have already erased any relevant information about her from his mind. Especially a lost memory at a sword store in Loguetown.

_Although he realized that my rank has changed._

But after the astonishment passed, she happily told about some successful operations.

That day, they talked until midnight. That day, she realized that something about her had _changed_.

Since then, Tashigi seemed to be always living inside her own mind, always replaying that night. The conversation, his voice calm and low, an almost silent laugh that didn't seem pretentious at all. She was constantly thinking about how, at least for that short time, their relationship seemed to be more friendly.

And how she had liked that.

_プルルル purururu_

She almost threw the den den mushi on the floor when it ringed.

"H-Hello?"

"Oe, madam cap'n. Robin said you called…"

She thought she was either imagining things or he was talking to someone close because she heard a whisper that sounded a lot like _"after two months..."_.

Two months. Sixty-one days and twenty-two hours (it was coming to sixty-two days now). She knew it was two months because she counted every day and fought against herself to not call. It's impossible that Roronoa Zoro would have bothered to count too.

_Impossible. He must be talking to someone else._

"A-Ah y-y-yes. Y-Yeah."

"Why the hell are you stuttering so much?"

"F-For n-nothing!!"

"Something happened because you're really stuttering."

"I already said it's nothing, damn it!!"

"Great, you stopped. So what do you want?"

She wasn't going to lie that she was surprised that he pissed her off just so she would stop stuttering. Annoying each other is something that came naturally due to the eccentricity of their relationship, but knowing that doing that could also be used for another purpose like getting her to stop stuttering?

And why the hell did she stutter so much?

Tashigi was stunned for a few seconds and thought about it in silence.

"Four eyes?"

His voice seemed to awaken her from any spiral of thoughts she was having and she remembered why she called. And, just for now, she would let herself be taken once again by the illusion of companionship between them.

"I won today."

"Congratulations", Zoro simply replied.

"You don't even know what I'm talking about, you blockhead."

"Yes, I do know."

_How? How do you know?_

For some reason, the two had this strange connection that was completely inexplicable and Zoro usually managed to understand it somehow. Tashigi always found it very curious because… what could that mean? Maybe they were always doomed to know each other? A connection between rivals? A connection from friends in another life?

Or maybe... a connection in the form of a very imperceptible red line tied to her pinky?

 _Yeah, right. Don't be stupid, Tashigi_ , she thought.

Anyway, she always forced herself to never think about it because he most certainly _did not_.

"Why did you call that night?"

Once again. The inexplicable connection. She knew what night he was referring to because she thought about it every day and, for a second, she thought about denying it and saying she didn't know what he was talking about. But as she couldn't explain the connection and she knew he would be able to pinpoint the lie the moment it'd leave her mouth, so there was no reason to run. If she is going to live this false camaraderie just for today, then what is wrong with speaking the truth?

_An illusion. Only for today. Don't stutter._

"Because I lost and wanted to talk to someone."

"And you called me", Zoro didn't ask, he just spoke as a matter of fact.

"Yes. I usually… don't have many people to talk to, so I thought you could listen to me. At least once... without caring about the issue of navy and pirates. But... it's completely wrong and silly of me. I mean, I'm a marine and I shouldn't—"

"You didn't call for two months", Zoro totally ignored Tashigi's last words.

So he had actually whispered that, but... either he read her thoughts or the snail had some way of seeing the last call. It's not possible that he had counted the days and weeks. How did he know then?

_Lie. Lie. Lie._

_Don't say it was because of him._

"Ah yes. I was busy working on the G-5 and after Smoker-san found out, we ended up leaving the den den mushi with you guys once and for all, so I didn't have to call—"

"Liar", Zoro cut her off once again.

"Liar?! I'm not a liar, you madcap!", Tashigi was already snorting with the pirate's audacity. It was amazing how easily he managed to get her worked up.

"Liar."

"Roronoa—!"

"If you're going to keep lying, I'll hang up."

"Then hang up! I don’t care!"

"Fine."

"Fine!"

Why couldn't she be honest with him? Why couldn't she act right around him? Maybe… because she didn't want him to think she was weaker than he already does? Because she didn't want him to have an advantage over her in any way? Because she didn't want him to find out that his opinion has become important to her?

_Give in just once, Tashigi._

Then she swallowed her embarrassment and pride and answered in an almost inaudible voice.

"I don't like being a nuisance. I never liked. But anyway... what difference does it make whether I called or not?"

"Haa? Wasn't you who said you would be my conscience since I told you about my fight against Mihawk?"

"Yes, but because that was stupidly stupid!! I still can't believe you were stupid to that extent. I honestly can't understand how your crew lets you do these stupid things", Tashigi exclaimed once more. Yeah, it looks like Zoro was really skilled at getting her to act that way.

"Oee, there were many 'stupid' there!!"

"Anyway. It's not like you need me for anything, so it makes no difference."

"But you called today. So… does that mean it's you who needs me?", Zoro replied in the blink of an eye and his deep tone momentarily stunned Tashigi.

Silence.

She could almost see his cocky grin as if he himself was in front of her. She could hear her own heart beating frantically.

_Perhaps._

"W-W-what ?? W-What are y-you talking about???!!!"

Tashigi knew that he had no way of seeing her through the den den mushi, but the action of hiding her completely red face with her arms was totally involuntary. Zoro just laughed out loud and she could hear Sanji's voice in the background ( _“Oe shitty marimo, shut up! Hey… are you talking to Tashigi-chan?!? You bastard, let me talk to her!!"_ ).

"You're always so uptight. I'm just kidding, four-eyes."

_But somehow... you nailed it._

She couldn't speak anymore because, apparently, Sanji had decided to take the den den mushi from Zoro's hand and now the two were fighting. In the midst of so much insult, Tashigi could make out just a few sentences — the cook asked how she was doing, how the children were doing and the swordsman shouted at him telling him to leave because _“she called to talk to me and not the pervert of this crew!”_. Soon, Luffy, Chopper, and Usopp joined the chorus and everything became a mess.

She just laughed and calmly called the cook.

"Sanji-san."

"Yeeees, Tashigi-chaaan!?"

"I will hang up soon. Can I say one last thing to Roronoa?"

She heard Zoro mocking Sanji, but couldn't understand what it was. Tashigi laughed softly because she always thought their relationship was funny and was always impressed to see Zoro so free when they argued. Nami said that the cook was one of the few able to get on the swordsman's nerve, but that Tashigi was not far behind.

In the end, Sanji accepted, cursed Zoro once more and said goodbye to her. Apparently, the others did the same — all saying good night to the captain. And with the cook's departure, the silence returned. It was an old friend of theirs — at times it was suffocating and unbearable, but at times it was welcoming.

"Sorry for the mess."

"It's okay."

A heartbeat. Tashigi decided to muster courage. She couldn't sleep with that question stuck in her throat.

"Roronoa."

"Hm?"

"Why was Robin-san in your bed earlier?", she asked on an impulse but regretted it right after. _What kind of question was that, Tashigi??_

"What?? What kind of question is that??"

"I just wanted to know."

"Don't you think you wanna know too much?", Zoro sounded really uncomfortable.

"Right. Forgive me", she knew she shouldn't have asked that because it was none of her business, but she couldn't help it. Robin's voice and _Roronoa's bed_ echoed in her head over and over until he called. The waves were very violent in that short time.

Then she forced herself to remember the reason for the call. "Roronoa."

"What."

"I'll get stronger", Tashigi spoke with determination because giving up was not in her nature.

"I'm waiting for that", and Zoro replied as if he understood the meaning behind her stern voice.

"Thanks and good night."

"Yeah. You too."

Tashigi did not call for the next two weeks because it was only _now_ that she began to have a vague idea of what had changed since the day they talked until midnight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The legend of The Red Thread of Fate says that everyone is born with a red thread tied to his finger that would be linked to someone else.  
> I really think it applies to Zoro and Tashigi - something that may have to do with destiny, whether they believe it or not. :)


	3. it's not you

Deep down, Tashigi did not intend to call after the conversation in which she told Zoro that she had won. Two weeks had passed since then and two weeks she lived in complete agony.

_Nico Robin, Roronoa's bed, the two months, the fateful conversation until midnight, the need for him._

Tashigi entered a vicious cycle of thoughts and didn’t know how to get out. Since the last call, the captain realized one thing: for some reason, everything related to Roronoa Zoro had a great effect on her.

The voice, the laughter, the blunt words (sometimes too blunt), his frown so close, the feel of his arm around her waist, his back so close to her hands.

Everything.

But she didn't want to give names. She didn't want to admit anything that would compromise her. She wasn't going to say anything and she was doing everything possible and impossible to not think about it. Talking is the same as admitting and she wouldn't do it at all. It’s completely outside the rules and totally unreasonable.

She _wouldn’t_ speak out loud.

_Nico Robin, Roronoa's bed, the two months, the fateful conversation until midnight, the need for him._

The two months… How did he know? Impossible that he had counted the days. Maybe Sanji? Or Nami? It’s quite possible. They’d be able to remember it. But not Zoro. Never Zoro.

_Nico Robin, Roronoa's bed, the two months, the fateful conversation until midnight, the need for him._

Day after day, Tashigi forced herself not to try to decipher anything about it during her training, but the scars on her palms and the shine of Shigure's edge continued to betray her. Every muscle contraction, every slow breath, every swing of the sword, every accurate blow brought the image of _that man_ to her mind.

If training didn't help her to distract, then she just needed to do something else.

Unsuccessfully.

The salty scent of the sea reminded her of the faint scent imbued in his green coat mixed with some other fragrance that she couldn’t pinpoint. Cinnamon, maybe? She didn't have enough time to investigate what that smell was, but it was good and for some reason, she wished it had stayed in her own coat for a while.

Plains covered with vegetation of the most varied greens reminded her of his famous hair and it didn’t surprise her. After all, it’s an unusual hair color (but it matched him, for another unknown reason), but what struck her was the fact that she wanted to know how soft it was.

Tashigi frowned and bit her lip.

“Go away!”, she shouted.

_I don't need his approval._

The swordswoman has always lived by herself, always independent and self-sufficient. His approval shouldn't matter. Nothing he thought about her should matter because she was an honorable Navy captain, Smoker’s subordinate, and confident in her abilities.

But never confident enough in front of _that man_.

She knew that the Tashigi of today wouldn’t win his recognition because she wasn’t strong enough yet. Although it still hurt to admit, she knew she would _never_ make progress if she were not honest with herself. She _wanted_ his approval because, pirate or not, Zoro was a _formidable_ swordsman.

There. Simple as that.

There was no hesitation in his movements or a shred of self-doubt in his carefully executed blows. Whatever was his motivation, Tashigi knew it was strong enough for him to push himself beyond his limits and, in part, to swallow his pride and ask Dracule Mihawk to train him.

She knew that swallowing her pride had almost a nasty taste and left an unbearable bitterness in the mouth. She knew it because that’s what she had to do right after leaving Punk Hazard. Tashigi had to swallow all her pride to admit that Roronoa Zoro was not exactly what she thought.

He was _so much more_ than she thought.

And it was the only thing she has been thinking since then.

For a couple of days, she succeeded in deceiving herself while she said internally ( _always_ internally, _never_ aloud) that the reason why Zoro appeared randomly in her mind was just something recent and fleeting — Tashigi was simply surprised by his recent actions.

But that was a lie because Punk Hazard happened a few months ago and it was a milestone in her life, but at the heart of it all was Zoro. Everything that happened in their brief encounter was engraved on her in the same way that the scars of several battles and training remain on her skin after so long.

In fact, the whole Punk Hazard ordeal has become a big wound that has not yet healed. A wound deep enough to reside under the skin, in a way that she couldn't use anything to heal. The defeats, the words of Trafalgar Law (which she still hears even in her dreams), the feeling of guilt for the Navy's neglect of the children and especially, the absurd growth of Zoro which was able to open her eyes to the fact of how far away she is.

Tashigi has used all of this as a fuel every day.

Every single day, her first thought on waking up in the morning turned into _I need to become strong_.

_Strong._

_Stronger._

_And stronger._

(The second was always _him_.)

She knew she wouldn't have a chance to have a mentor like Mihawk, but that was no excuse. In fact, enough of excuses because before the absence of two years and without a master, Zoro was already astounding and Tashigi was no match for him. He had to be self-taught in the same way as she has always been. These are her conditions and there was no use in crying.

Even though she hated to admit it, this new way of looking at life was, once again, due to Zoro.

She couldn't express in words how his simple act of fighting Monet made Tashigi know Roronoa Zoro as if it was the first time. It seems a little gruesome when she thinks that that specific moment represented a new turning point in her life, but as long as she didn't speak out loud, no one would judge her.

He saved her and "wounded" an opponent who, ironically, was a woman.

Simples as that.

All the prejudice she felt for him was based on the fact that he was a man like so many others — another one who refused to seriously fight a woman because he considered them inferior. But… in the end, Zoro not only did not despise women as opponents, but he also fought with determination if he considered them a _threat_.

If Tashigi's strange connection to him was minimally correct, she supposed that maybe he just _didn't like_ hurting women. She had thought about it a lot on the nights when she didn't call him, lying on her bed, her body numb from training so much. Maybe there was a reason behind it. Was it possible that he had hurt some important woman in his life? But if he didn't like to hurt women, why would he have hurt one on purpose? Or was it unwitting? Or did he see someone hurt a woman in front of him?

There were _so many things_ she wanted to ask.

So maybe his refusal to cut her might have something to do with this whole story that she didn't know. And possibly she would never know. Or who knows, he might just refuse to cut her because he deemed her to be inferior and no longer because she was a woman, but because she was not a worthy opponent. After all, he always said that their dispute had been decided right there in Loguetown.

To consider that possibility was, again, to accept a new pain. In fact, meeting Roronoa Zoro meant accumulating a wide variety of pains and disappointments — some more anguishing than others, but the pain of contempt has always been the most torturous because it truly hurt not only her pride but something more that she _dared_ not give a name.

And so, Tashigi lived every day for the past two weeks — torn between wondering what changed ( _Nico Robin, Roronoa's bed, the two months, the fateful conversation until midnight, the need for him._ ) and why he disdained her so much. The daydreams consumed her so much that she couldn't go unnoticed either by Vice Admiral Smoker or by Rear Admiral Hina.

Unfortunately.

Hina or Smoker seemed to have no interest (or time) in dealing with romantic relationships, although Tashigi had a slight impression that one was the other's soft spot. The captain would never comment on anything like that, but she always felt it in the air around them whenever she watched them. She liked the idea and would like to have something similar in the future.

But that was not the point. The point is that she never expected to be advised by Hina to go to a Navy charity ball with a _plus one_.

Tashigi almost had an anxiety attack.

Balls were synonymous of dresses, high heels, and dances. Three things that Tashigi had no skill at all and just the idea of making a fool of herself made her nauseous. And even worse — in front of a guy. Another area in which she had zero knowledge. Most people knew the captain's personality since she wasn't exactly a mysterious woman ( _Always wearing your heart on your sleeve, isn't it, Tashigi?_ ) And she didn't doubt her ability to make it very clear how inexperienced she was on the matter.

But it would be a good way to stop thinking about _that man_ and the mystery he was.

At least for today.

The swordsman had already bathed and was trying, awkwardly, to put on makeup with the little understanding she had about it. Until now, she was even doing well. The eyeliner was complicated, but she had already succeeded in the left eye. She was halfway through the right eye when she received a call from the den den mushi.

_プルルル purururu_

Tashigi's heart jumped and so did her hand.

She streaked up to her eyebrow and the eyeliner of her right eye was ruined.

_プルルル purururu_

The captain wanted to ignore the call, but her hands seemed to have a life of their own.

"Oe."

"R-Roronoa!", she said startled.

"Are you busy, captain four-eyes?", Zoro yawned and asked with indifference.

"N-no ... Not now. Only in an hour."

"Haa...? Special operation?", Zoro asked slightly curious.

"Uh... No. I wished."

Tashigi let out an embarrassed laugh, but Zoro remained silent. She really didn't want to talk to him about it, so she decided to throw him off the track.

"But what happened? It must be urgent considering that you called me."

"If it's no mission, then what is it? Are you coming after us?", Zoro ignored the captain's question and asked seriously.

"Haa? No! You know you all are not a priority now! And anyway, I wouldn't tell you about our activities anyway!"

"So what is it?"

"Don't you think you want to know too much, Roronoa??!"

_Where did this curiosity come from?_

"Ugh, you—! If there is something related to us, I feel in the right to want to know more, yes, four-eyes!"

_This man's audacity has no limits._

Tashigi had a sharp answer on the tip of her tongue but decided to swallow the words. Soon after, she was apprehensive because she did not know whether to tell the truth or not.

_I feel like I'm going to regret bitterly if I tell him the truth._

Still, she chose sincerity.

"It's… a date."

Tashigi gave another embarrassed laugh and Zoro, once again, chose silence. When he spoke again, his voice was low and quiet.

"A date like a date with a guy?"

"Yes."

"I didn't think you cared about this kind of stuff."

"Not usually. But Hina-san apparently thinks differently. She asked me to go with someone to a charity ball."

_So embarrassing._

"Do you know him?"

"Yes. He's nice, but..."

"But?", Zoro asked with some eagerness.

_It's not you._

Her heart flipped. Tashigi widened her eyes.

Now that was not something that she thought would cross her mind under any circumstances and at any time in her life.

_What the hell is going on with me?_

"I-I just never thought about him that way."

"And you'll still go anyway?", Zoro continued to press and Tashigi began to feel anxious.

"Well, I have no other choice now. And anyway, that's how you get to know people better, Roronoa."

Zoro's silence sometimes meant a lot. Inside her, the strange connection made her feel that way, although she could never decipher exactly what and how much he usually wants to say.

"And you want to know him?", Zoro asked sharply.

"Maybe."

_I wonder._

Tashigi heard a cracking glass and was immediately concerned. Were they being attacked? And if they were, who could it be? She and Smoker monitored the Straw Hat's footsteps as they could and discreetly whenever they had the opportunity. But it’s not like they worry. It's not that. It was just a way to have some control over their activities. That's all.

"Is everything okay? I heard a noise. Someone got hurt?"

Zoro ignored her question and in a heartbeat, answered without hesitation.

"You once asked me for a reason that I think that prevents you from getting stronger. That is a reason. Instead of going out, you could be training. How the hell are you going to defeat me one day?"

Tashigi was surprised by the coldness in Zoro's voice and even more by the words he had just spoken. She couldn't understand how, suddenly, he acted so detestably.

Cold anger began to swell within her.

"What—? You—!! Do you realize what you just said?? This has nothing to do with anything, Roronoa!! It's part of my job!!", Tashigi spat the words out with palpable anger.

"Of course it does!! Your job _needs_ you to be strong, but all I see is an insecure and pathetic woman who doesn't make good on her own words!!"

"What—? How dare you, you... you jerk!! What right do you have to say— to say something like that?? How… how dare you—"

She knew he despised her, but to the point of humiliating her in such a way was a new discovery for her. More and more her voice was drowned out by the blood pulsing in his ears.

"What right do _you_ have to talk to us like that?!! What right do you have to always disrespect ME whenever you have the opportuni—"

"I HAVE ALWAYS RESPECTED YOU!!", Tashigi yelled, extremely furious, "Your strength and your... your perseverance!! But... But you... you don't even try to respect me!!! ALWAYS despising me over and over again! You're the type of person—"

"I what?? C'mon, spit it out, Captain!!", Zoro's tone of voice was angry, bordering on rage.

"You're the kind of person I hate the most!! Walking around all high and mighty as if you were better than everyone!!! As if you have NEVER failed in ANYTHING in your life and I—", Tashigi's gasped.

"You what? C'mon, captain, what is it with you? It's easy to talk about me, isn't it? But how about _you_?", Zoro spat out the words as if they were poison, the ire completely apparent in his voice now. Tashigi gritted her teeth and shouted, her voice choked.

"The thing I mostly do is fail!! I can never help anyone and you ALWAYS remind me of this just by existing!!!", she replied and released the breath she hadn't even realized she was holding. Zoro was momentarily silent, but then he gave a dry and evil laugh.

"At least I'm able to remind you how disappointing you are."

"YOU—"

Tashigi could feel her blood boiling and all she wanted to do was hurt him. If it was not possible to slash him with her sword at the moment, she would hit him with words. And she wanted it to hurt. A lot.

"You are a complete ASSHOLE, did you know that Roronoa?!!? Not all of us need to give up everything as you did for a STUPIDLY IDIOTIC dream!!!"

She knew it would hurt him, even if only superficially. But why did it seem so wrong? He was a damn pirate, so why the hell did it hurt her too? But who was she to speak ill of others' dreams? That wasn't her, but now it was too late to go back. All the reason was already gone with the tears that flowed freely.

"Idiotic dream??? Be very careful with what you say, Captain. You DO NOT know me", she could feel Zoro's threatening aura through the call. His voice became so cold and intimidating that Tashigi shuddered as if he had Wado Ichimonji's blade around her neck.

"Clearly. Have a good night, Roronoa."

Tashigi hung up without a second thought. She wiped her tears away, swallowed hard, removed her makeup, and began to redo it.

Neither spoke for two more months, but after that day, she swore that she would do the possible and the impossible to never have any more connection with Roronoa Zoro.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If Oda still gets them to cross paths again, I still think that until they really get along, they will still hurt each other too much. It is a somewhat complicated relationship to be resolved so quickly. ;)
> 
> Edit 1: by the way, I have to tell you that the work from [Converselaces](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Converselaces/pseuds/Converselaces) is what inspired me to write their fight and you all should check her story because it's amazing!  
> Edit 2: I had to adjust some of the dialogues of the fight so it could make sense in the future. ;)


	4. violence

_プルルル purururu_

It was almost midnight and Tashigi was resting on the infirmary bed with her whole body bandaged. Her face was hidden, with only the left eye uncovered — the torso, arms and legs all hidden under several layers of bandage. Smoker sat next to her, this time smoking three cigars instead of the usual two. The den den mushi that belonged to her was in the hands of the Vice-Admiral when it rang. She moved to answer it, but everything hurt and she couldn't help but let out a painful groan.

Smoker took a drag and glared at the captain. Instead of giving her the snail, he went to the window and answered it. From where he was, Tashigi couldn't hear anything.

"Smoker speaking. (...) You got some nerve to call, boy. (...) No. (...) Already said no."

Tashigi was dying inside because she wanted to know who the hell her superior was talking to, and these pauses between each response did nothing to satisfy her curiosity.

"Humph. Just because I owe you one, _Mugiwara_."

_Mugiwara? What does he want?_

"Do as you wish. You have ten minutes at most."

Smoker helped Tashigi to sit very carefully, adjusted her pillow and blanket and finally handed the den den mushi into her hands. He looked at her steadily and muttered, _"I'll be back in exactly ten minutes, Tashigi"_. She understood that it was an order and one that she should not disobey.

"H-Hello?"

Her voice was still hoarse because of the strangulation, so it was difficult to communicate. The marine has never been a loud person, but her voice was never a whisper. As she was a captain and had subordinates of all kinds, she needed to be able to speak clearly.

"Four eyes."

"Ah. Roronoa", Tashigi was surprised but realized that her voice came out completely devoid of emotion. It wasn't the intention, but she was really tired and her whole body ached as if it went through a steamroller. Besides, when Smoker said _Mugiwara_ , she expected nothing less than the hyperactive captain of the crew.

"I…"

"It's all right. I did what I did by my choice, not because you were weak."

"Exactly!! Didn't it cross your mind that you could have died, you idiot??", he exclaimed.

"Yes."

"Then why the hell did you do that???"

"Because I wanted to", she replied without hesitation.

Tashigi was too tired to fight, so she took advantage of her indifferent voice to end the argument as soon as possible and finally go to sleep. Zoro was the last thing she wanted to deal with at the moment.

"I don't remember asking for your help, woman!! Gosh, how annoying you are—"

"Did you call just to complain? Because if it was, I'm going to hang up. See you la—"

"Wait!!"

Zoro was silent for a few seconds and Tashigi waited patiently. At the moment, she didn't have the energy to decipher his silence. When he spoke again, his voice sounded melancholic, but it could also be the effect of the medication messing with her perception.

"Did you want me to carry the burden that you could have died because of me?"

"What difference does it make?"

"What difference… Man, you must really be an airhead to say something like that, woman", Zoro sighed and Tashigi was almost sure he was rolling his good eye.

_Strange connection... are you still here?_

This time, she could see that, under the angry tone, there was a very low frequency, almost imperceptible, which indicated a certain concern. And Tashigi can understand where it comes from. She would also be very concerned about anyone who had the courage to risk its own life for her.

But that attention coming specifically _from him_ left her without knowing what to think. _Or maybe the drugs are working now._ At least, Zoro seemed less agitated, so she could give in a little.

"Wouldn't you do the same for Luffy-san?", Tashigi sighed and asked tiredly.

"Yes.", Zoro replied in a heartbeat.

_Always loyal._

"So there you go."

"It's different."

"How?"

"It's _different_."

She had no idea how different it could be. Sure, what she was implying was that Roronoa Zoro was just as important to her ( _What the hell am I talking about? The meds are messing me up..._ ) as Luffy was to the swordsman (and the captain was _very_ special to all of them), but... she was not in a condition to argue with her own brain at the moment. _Perhaps it is partially true._

Roronoa Zoro was important, but... _Important for whom? For me or for what's to come?_

She no longer knew what was going on. The reason seemed to slowly go away with every minute she kept listening to his voice.

The marine heard a knock on the door and right after that, Smoker's voice — _“You have five more minutes, Tashigi. Tell that damn pirate to go to sleep and leave you alone”_ — but she didn't know when they would talk again (she couldn't help being disappointed by the fact), so she tried to prolong it a little bit so that his voice would remain with her for the months to come.

_Yeah, it's definitely the meds._

But before that short moment that she could finally hear him after so long was over, she remembered something that had been consuming her day after day. Even if that person was a natural enemy, that Tashigi from two months ago was not her. It has _never_ been her. Tashigi always had a very kind soul and she wanted to apologize from the bottom of her heart.

After the fateful argument they had over den den mushi two months ago, Tashigi entered a cycle of unstoppable anger. Her workouts were heavier, her attacks much more violent, her movements faster and full of hatred and her goal became to hurt him if they ever cross blades again.

She would do anything to cut Roronoa Zoro.

Even train Nitoryu.

The first time that fleeting thought crossed her mind, Tashigi felt disgusted. What the hell was she thinking? This style was something he used, something that belonged to _him_. She would never lower herself to that level — to the level of an extremely despicable pirate.

But the second time, she realized that, in fact, the Nitoryu that Zoro uses is something he particularly created. But the technique of wielding two swords, on the other hand, is not uncommon. Lady Hiyori had told her that her father used a variation of Nitoryu and Tashigi knew that the despicable Orochi did too.

So it wasn't wrong. But it seemed _so wrong_.

It looked like she was getting hold of something that didn't belong to her. Something that was not her style.

But at the same time, she recognized that she needed to get stronger. That would mean that she could protect _much more_ and who knows, be as strong as _he_ is. Of course, she didn't want to care about Zoro anymore, but she had also long ago accepted that the man was tough and an admirable swordsman. There was no turning back in that regard.

However, during that time, she wanted to defeat him more than anything and if wielding two swords would help her achieve that goal, so screw it, she would swallow the contempt she felt for him and keep going.

So, now Yamaoroshi was permanently on her waist next to Shigure.

But Zoro wasn't the only reason Tashigi dived in an uncontrollable bloodlust. When she began her training in the art of the sword, she swore that she would use all her knowledge to _protect_ , never to _kill_. But the pirate attacks became more constant and cruel, so she had to break her oath. She broke it violently and beyond the limits of common sense because she couldn't accept the injustices of this world, the villainy of the people, the unnecessary killing… and her own anger towards it. It was consuming her as if she were sinking at an alarming rate in untamed waters.

The waves were furious as if they wanted to wreck all the ships that sailed in the vastness of the ocean.

Because, even though Roronoa Zoro had been despicable with her, Tashigi knew that he was not inhuman. She was well aware the Straw Hats were an _exception_ , but she couldn't work with exceptions. It's not as if they are able to remove the intrinsic barbarity of most pirates simply because they exist. It infuriated her. Why did they have to be the _exception_ and not the _rule_?

It seemed that the bunch existed only to break her beliefs, one after the other. She always felt like she was going back to square one as if she were in a vicious cycle.

But the last stages of her rampant anger were depression and acceptance. As soon as the hate started to fade away, the sadness kicked in. Smoker, unfortunately, noticed and called her out one day.

_"I have no idea what's going on with you and if you don't want to tell me, whatever. But that's not you. Take a week off and think about what you're doing. This anger isn't going to do you any good and I need you to be healthy. Things are going to get more fucked up, Tashigi."_

What the hell was she doing? Who was this Tashigi? She knew that the anger at the injustice and savagery of the world was justified, but violence wasn't the solution to the problems. Obviously it would also be naive of her to believe that she would never have to get her hands dirty. She was a marine and the chances that she would be in eternal battles were always high — some would be easy, but others would be full of blood. She knew that.

But letting the violence inside her burn like fire until there was nothing left but her bones was not the answer.

When she looked at her reflex in the mirror, she couldn't see the captain who always had the welfare of the people around her in mind. When did she let herself be influenced by someone's words? Yes, Zoro had no right to speak to her like that, but she also had no right to speak about his dream and despise him so many times in the past without even knowing him.

Everyone deserves a second chance and she hasn't even considered that.

When the whole cycle of anger ended, she realized that it wasn't just his words that hurt her. What really hurt her is the fact that she collected more defeats than victories in her life. When she yelled at him that she always failed and couldn't protect enough, she was admitting out loud all the frustration she had with herself. Zoro's coldness was only the trigger for years of disgust to be taken out of her like a lake overflowing.

And apparently, a life-and-death situation is really capable of changing a person's perspectives.

She wanted a fresh start. Zoro beat her to it.

"Four eyes."

"Mmm?"

"I was a complete asshole last time. I'm really sorry.", Zoro's voice seemed genuinely sincere, she could _feel_ it.

"Yes, you were. But I was wrong too… I'm sorry for everything I said… Sorry for calling your dream stupid."

She wanted to say more and wanted answers.

"Why were we so mean to each other?"

"Dunno. I think we're just very different."

"Yeah, maybe."

Tashigi nodded and got ready to hang up, but before that, an idea came to her mind and the drugs must have been really messing with her head because she ended up blurting a question without a second thought.

"Any of these days that we meet and well, being on good terms your crew, can you tell me more about your dream?"

The swordsman chose silence again and Tashigi mentally berated herself for having exceeded someone's personal boundaries, even if that person was Roronoa Zoro. _Besides… of course, he won't want to tell you._

"I-If you wish to, of course."

"Okay."

She allowed herself to smile affectionately. _Maybe now I can get to know him better._

"Four eyes."

"Yes?"

"Can I visit you?"

Tashigi was stunned by the suggestion.

"W-What? Are you crazy? It is a Navy's ship. You won't be able to get out of here without being arrested!!"

"I'll figure something out."

His tone left no room for discussion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With this chapter, I meant to say that the Navy is really capable of being violent. It's unrealistic that there's no violence every time they need to protect an island and everything. It's completely unreal that Tashigi never got her hands dirty. She's a soldier, someone with a high chance of always being at war.
> 
> She is a sweet person but has also been trained to kill if necessary.
> 
> Besides, I think that, even though we don't see that happening in the manga, she must always have this vicious cycle in her head of not knowing where her idea of justice fits after meeting Luffy and company. And sometimes it might turn into a snowball that ends up making things worse. ;(


	5. get to know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long chapter, guys, forgive me!

Because of the painkillers, Tashigi was in a drowsy state for about forty minutes. She had secretly tried to ignore the drugs because she wanted to force her body to endure the pain as a form of training, but it had reached such alarming levels that she couldn't take it anymore. _You will not die if you do not train today, Tashigi_.

When she was finally asleep, Tashigi heard the sound of her window opening. Instantly, she went into alert mode due to years of working in the Navy, but unfortunately, she was without her glasses and the darkness of the room didn't help, even if it was dimly lit by the moon. The swordswoman tried to calm down and perform any movement only when the intruder came close.

Shigure and Yamaoroshi were close to her. She was in great pain, but she would not be defeated so easily by anyone.

Maybe just by _that man_.

When the figure was only three paces from her bed, Tashigi acted much faster than she thought she could. She removed Shigure in a single movement and with enough force to cut anyone in half.

A sword blocked her blow. The clink of three earrings resonated in the quiet room.

"You really are a dangerous woman."

Instantly, Tashigi released her sword and turned on the lamp beside the bed. She put on her glasses and found Roronoa Zoro with a god damn crooked smile on his face.

"W-What the hell, Roronoa! You almost scared me to death!"

"It's your fault that you didn't close the window, you moron."

"Ugh!", Tashigi rolled her eyes, but spoke again in a more calm tone, "I thought you all… would have left by now."

"Captain told us to wait until you got a little better to the point of walking because he wants to throw you a party."

"A-a p-party?? For me?", Tashigi widened her eyes and gasped.

"Don't try to understand. Luffy doesn't usually distinguish people — for him, there are only friends and enemies. Simple as that.", Zoro just shrugged.

Tashigi looked at Zoro for a few seconds, blinking more than she should have. Confusion was what she felt. A pirate wanted to throw a party for a marine to celebrate that she was feeling better?

Honestly, Mugiwara was never going to stop amazing her.

The girl let out a loud and delicious laugh and whatever if Zoro thought she was strange, but she wanted to laugh a lot at the simplicity of his captain. The swordsman just smiled.

"Luffy-san is a really good person. There's no denying it."

Tashigi offered a kind smile to the pirate who had his eyebrows raised and at that moment, she decided that he was very handsome with his guard down. _In fact, he is handsome anytime_ , she thought. This was something she had noticed in Punk Hazard, but her contempt for the man prevented her from admitting it.

Even now, quite bandaged like her, there was no denying that Roronoa Zoro was an attractive man.

He settled himself in the same chair that Smoker was sitting on a few hours ago and then his eye roamed her body taking note of all the places that were bandaged. The marine felt no malice in the act and if she knew him better, she would say that his expression seemed a little sad.

_But I don't really know him. As he made it clear two months ago._

However, she risked her life for this man that she "didn't know well" anyway. Tashigi had already fought briefly alongside him during KAGERO's investigation and even went so far as to protect him, but this time it was quite different. She just couldn't turn a blind eye to a disabled Zoro on the ground, while an enemy sword would cut him in a way not so different from the scar he carried on his chest. Zoro had fought to protect her from the cowardice of two enemies, but he had, with great difficulty, been defeated. Then, without thinking twice, Tashigi intercepted the attack.

It was so fast that she didn't even have time to draw her sword. She simply protected him with her own body. And this new scar, so similar to his, was permanently on her back.

Even though the pain was almost unbearable, Tashigi stood her ground. She endured all the attacks and returned them with a speed and ferocity that she thought could only have been the adrenaline kicking in. She decided that under no circumstances she could let the fight reach Zoro. She was almost certain that the Straw Hats would be of the utmost importance for an inevitable war to come. A war that she could already feel in her own bones.

_And I… I don't want you to die before I really get to know you._

So, protecting him was what she did. Tashigi had bruises and blood everywhere, a deep gash on her back, a cut on the right side of her face, strangulation marks, some broken ribs, but she managed to defeat an opponent worthy of Roronoa Zoro. Too bad the pain was so immense that she couldn't even boast about it.

The marine really thought she was going to die.

In fact, when she showed up carrying a completely injured and unconscious Zoro by the shoulders and then passing out in front of the entire Thousand Sunny crew, _everyone_ thought she was going to die.

Thereafter, Tashigi doesn’t know which events were real and which were delirium. She remembered only the desperate tone in the dear reindeer's voice, Nico Robin's Hana Hana no Mi hands lifting her off the floor, Nami calling for her and Zoro and nothing more. Nightmares were always full of screams and the horrendous sight of Zoro dead on the floor with the sword stuck in his chest. Sometimes, the sword went through both of them and at other times, she wasn’t fast enough to intercept the first attack.

"I heard you woke up yesterday. I'd have come before if I could", he whispered.

"Chopper-san will make those wounds open again if he doesn’t find you in the infirmary", Tashigi quipped. The medications were really messing with her taking into account she was being able to joke with a pirate.

"I'll deal with Chopper later. Coming here was more important", his deep voice made Tashigi feel strange and taken aback.

"A-a-ah… you d-d-didn't need to", she adjusted her glasses and lowered her face, embarrassed.

Zoro stared at her openly with anger and she could feel how he was controlling himself not to snap at her. She wanted to shrink away from under his gaze, but she held on. So, Tashigi tried to lighten the mood.

"A-Ahn… we are like two mummies. And… oops! A wound just opened", she looked at her belly and winced.

"You idiot, why the hell did you move that way just now? Obviously it was going to open just by drawing the sword!", Zoro gestured indignantly.

"I thought it was someone trying to get in to kill me! Did you want me to stay still?"

"Who the hell was going to come in here to kill you, four-eyes?! You're unbelievable sometimes, woman— Oe, you're not even paying attention to me—!!"

As a matter of fact, Tashigi wasn't paying attention. She was staring at something in him.

"Chopper-san is really going to open your wounds now."

"What—?"

Zoro looked at her confused and Tashigi poked a spot in his belly where the bandages had started to bleed. The pirate looked at the place for a few seconds and then just sighed and shook his head.

"You're really nothing but trouble, woman."

The girl started to laugh and when she looked, Zoro was grinning at her. One thing she hadn't been privileged to see yet. When their laughter slowly faded away, Zoro looked away and his expression became slightly dejected. A few seconds later, the swordsman spoke again in a tired voice.

"You could have died."

"If I hadn't intervened, so would you."

"I was badly hurt, but you… you almost died.", Zoro's expression seemed, curiously, pained. She didn't know what was going through his head, but she wanted to know so _badly_.

"Well… That way you wouldn't need to put up with me anymore, right? It'd be a relief", she gave an embarrassed laugh and put her hand on the back of her neck, "You wouldn't have to put up with me asking to fight you all the time."

Zoro didn't seem to find it funny and just shot her a scolding look. Then he shook his head and ran a hand through his hair.

"Nami told me what happened… you were rescued by the guys and spent three days in a coma onboard Sunny until they were able to contact Smokey. He ran to find you and ordered you to be transferred to the Navy intensive care center. It seems like you stayed five more days passed out here."

Zoro held her gaze as he recounted all the events. Now his face was palpably sad. _Why are you sad, Roronoa?_ Then, he whispered again.

"Even Torao was taking care of you because of your critical condition."

Tashigi was thoughtful. So maybe part of what she thought was a delusion, had really happened. She had caused such chaos. The captain started to feel bad for having given them so much trouble. She didn't want to pass out in front of them — she just wanted to drop Zoro and leave — but apparently she couldn't do it. She made a mental note to thank them later.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be a nuisance. But what about you?"

Zoro just rolled his eye, "Geez, you apologize too much, marine woman. I don't know what's your problem. But I woke up three days ago, four-eyes."

Tashigi nodded and stared at her hands. The two remained silent for a few seconds until Zoro asked something in a shaky voice.

"Wouldn't it be better for you if I had died, woman?"

In the blink of an eye, Tashigi turned to face him with an outraged expression. How can he think something like that? Of course, by an irony of fate, they are on opposite sides, but Tashigi knew that for her to wish someone's death, that person would have to have been very _heinous_. And it's no secret that Roronoa Zoro and his crew _definitely_ did not fit into this group.

"I-I never thought that way! And I will never think like that! What do you think I am, Roronoa? A-A goddamn heartless marine?!?"

Zoro spent long seconds with his eye fixed on her without even blinking. It was so intense that Tashigi looked away again. The waves would pull her into the ocean if she continued to stare at him. Then, his face seemed to soften and he simply shook his head. She pouted but then sighed.

"I'm tired of it, Roronoa."

Zoro's eye widened and she knew why. What she said didn't come out in the tone she wanted, but the strange connection made him understand what she meant.

_A truce._

She was really tired of fighting fiercely with him, of trying to force him to be her enemy, of crossing blades in a hostile way, of always looking for ways to incriminate him, of looking for reasons to hate him. Too tired. Even more so in the situation she was in.

Tashigi has never been afraid to die, as this was something she had been taught since the beginning of her military training. You can die at sea, you can die in battles with pirates, you can die by accident, but if you accepted to pursue this profession, you need to know that your life belongs to the Navy's cause. So the swordswoman never thought that perishing would be a problem, as long as it was for justice.

Although the sense of justice that the Navy is _so_ proud of (and she too) is tainted. Tashigi felt tainted, too.

Still, she was surprised to have risked her life without a second thought for a _pirate_. She was shocked at the sheer horror that surged in the pit of her stomach at the simple idea of watching him die and doing nothing.

Zoro hesitantly raised his hand and Tashigi held her breath. She didn't know what he was going to do and suddenly, she became apprehensive.

Then he got closer and touched the bandaged side of her face.

Even though her face was completely covered with bandages, she still shivered at the contact. The simple gesture was able to warm up her insides and Tashigi couldn't help feeling how… intimate it seemed. Something that wasn’t meant for other people's eyes. Something that was supposed to exist only inside this dimly lit room.

The touch was so soft and so _different_. It contrasted so much with all that personality that he exhibited to the world that it even seemed out of character of him. She was also amazed at how such a calloused hand from so many battles and workouts could have such a soft touch.

No man had ever shown such affection for her.

But just as this lovely act happened, it soon ended. Zoro withdrew his hand and looked away. The captain couldn't tell whether he was blushing or if it was just her imagination. But one thing she did know: her face was burning and if it weren't for the fact that almost everything was covered, he'd be able to see how she looked like she was going to explode. _These drugs are making me more uneasy than usual._

So she tried to distract herself, racking her brain to find a way so that the silence wouldn’t become embarrassing — particularly one of the worst forms of the well-known friend of the two. Until she remembered something and stifled a laugh.

"Now I have a scar similar to yours, only it's on my back. Another in the right eye for now. I think I just need to dye my hair green, wear three earrings and get another sword. What do you think?", Tashigi raised her eyebrow and joked.

"Are you mocking me?", Zoro narrowed his eye and asked suspiciously.

"Yes.", Tashigi bit her lip to keep from laughing.

"You are really annoying, you know?", he narrowed his eye again.

"It's not the first time you've told me that."

Tashigi smiled slightly. It was true that Zoro was not very fond of her, but she could see the kindness he possessed behind the snarky remarks and the ever frown. She was able to see that he didn't try to offend her this time — he was probably too tired for that — and just wanted to tease her.

The swordsman's face turned serious and he seemed reluctant to say something. Tashigi waited patiently again.

"Thank you for saving me."

"Huh?"

"I won't repeat, you insufferable."

Zoro looked away again and even with the dim lighting in the room, she saw him clearly blush. _What stupid pride_. Tashigi rolled her eyes and chuckled quietly.

"You are the worst, you know?"

"It's not the first time you've told me that", Zoro gave a crooked smile and stared at her for a few seconds. The previous reluctance was gone and he looked genuinely confused.

"But seriously. Why did you save me?"

"What—? I-I… e-err…" 

"I swear if you stutter again—"

"I wanted to get to know you better!", Tashigi replied on impulse.

All the talk about the fact that she doesn't know him made a home inside her for a long time and now, the captain just couldn't take it anymore. He could laugh or mock her, but blurting the truth brought her a relief that she never imagined she would feel.

The waves were calm and she felt good.

"Haa??"

"Two months ago you said I didn't know you and… it's true. I've been chasing you without even knowing the person who I've been hunting", Tashigi shrugged.

She had to admit that it was a certain whim on her part and the chances of him not accepting it were very high. But she had already bet her money and there was no turning back. If he didn't accept it, there was nothing else she could do. Life goes on.

"O-o-of course i-if you d-don't want to, t-t-that's okay.", Tashigi replied and scratched her head.

Zoro didn’t look at her and seemed to be brooding, possibly weighing the pros and cons of letting someone considered a natural enemy to enter his life, even if superficially. After a while in silence, he leaned back in his chair with his arms behind his head and stared out of the corner of his good eye.

"All right. So, what's your favorite color?"

"Huh?"

Tashigi widened her eyes and opened her mouth in the shape of a perfect O because she did not believe what she had just heard. This time, was he the one making fun of her?

"Seriously?", now it was her turn to narrow her eyes.

"You said you wanted to get closer. So, what is it?", Zoro just shrugged.

It was serious and she couldn't believe it. _My God, is this how he makes friends?_

Tashigi started laughing out loud and Zoro looked slightly annoyed. He frowned instantly.

"You don't have to laugh so much, you idiot. Just don't tell—"

"That's not it, I'm sorry. It was just unexpected", she wiped away the tears that had appeared in the corners of her eyes, "But the color is pink. Yours should be what, blue?"

Tashigi put her hand on her chin and put on an expression indicating that she was trying to deduce something.

"Haa? You can only be stupid or something", Zoro raised an eyebrow.

"I'm just kidding! You really look like a walking highlighter", Tashigi shot him a mocking smile.

"… are you mocking me again?"

"Yes!"

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

"By the way, I'm going to make an exception and let you call me Zoro, Captain four-eyes."

"Because calling you Zoro is a great honor?"

"Something like that."

"You really are insufferable. As if I wanted to call you Zoro… Anyway, my name is Tashigi and that's what you _should_ be calling me."

"Pfft! Four-eyes is sooo much better."

"Ugh, do as you like."

.

.

.

.

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.

.

After two hours, Zoro tucked her in and went out the window to return to Sunny.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Deep down, Zoro is such a softie. 100% Tsundere.
> 
> An important note: The part where Tashigi starts calling him Zoro is something that I will probably always put on my fanfics because I think it'd be a very important event in their relationship. For me, that would mean that Tashigi stopped wanting to distance herself from him (since she only called him Roronoa) because she started to accept that he is what he is — a good man. It would become something intimate, with romantic nuances or not, where they could be starting to trust each other and becoming, who knows, friends. Or what we hope, more than friends.


	6. longing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay!

_Mugiwara_ didn't lie when he said he was throwing a party. The difference is that he practically started his activities from the moment Tashigi woke up without being groggy from the medications. The crew spent three days anchored near the G-5 ship and everyone always managed to visit her. So, as soon as the captain was able to get up without anyone's help, was when Monkey D. Luffy had put his hand on her shoulder and happily said that the _real_ party would start the next day and that he wanted everyone (literally _everyone_ ) in the Navy to participate.

She could see the vein pulsing on Smoker's forehead, but it took only an apologetic look from her to get him to accept and say nothing.

Luffy also asked if she wanted anything in particular and Tashigi honestly couldn't answer. She looked into the eyes of each one of the pirate crew (taking her time on Chopper because she always melted when the reindeer was nearby), but she didn't know exactly what she might want and what the hell they could offer.

Until she had a sudden idea.

_"I want to eat Sanji-san's food!"_

Tashigi thought that their impulsive way was starting to rub on her.

_They are… different._

As soon as the words were said, Sanji almost had a heart attack and jumped up to hug her (" _Tashigi-chaaan, I'll do anything you want!"_ ), but was stopped by Zoro's katana hitting his head ( _"She's still convalescing, curly eyebrow!!"_ ). The captain just smiled and tapped where the swordsman had just hit.

_"Thank you, Sanji-san. I can't barely wait."_

It was enough for Sanji to melt again and to Zoro start beating him.

The other day, Nami and Robin practically kidnapped her and took her to spend the day at Thousand Sunny because _"it's a party in your honor and we want you to be stunning"_. What stunning meant, she had no idea, but Tashigi had a very strong sense of justice, so she accepted the crew's antics for the simple fact that they had _saved her_.

They were under no obligation to do so, but they did it anyway.

It’s true that Tashigi was still feeling very tired, but she was already able to talk in an audible tone and walk without great difficulties. She also agreed to accompany the two women because she was exhausted from lying down and unable to see the sunlight.

She wanted to stretch her legs, stroll through the harbor, see the people, smell the sea, feel the pleasant wind on her face, hear the seagulls singing.

Hear the sound of _his_ laughter.

The captain admitted that she was very happy to know that Zoro was recovering in the same way that she was. Maybe faster, but healing anyway. He had a healthier, more relaxed face, wore few bandages, no injuries were visible. At the moment, he was sitting on the left staircase with Chopper on his lap and talking happily to Luffy. Tashigi took the time to watch the scene while Nami and Robin set up the room so they could get ready for the event later.

She couldn't decide whether it was a lovely or funny sight.

(Zoro was raising and lowering his hand and Chopper was trying to reach it).

She spent so much time creating a terrifying image of that man that seeing him so free shocked her. Because now… who was _this_ Zoro?

Time seemed to stop as she watched him and the earth stopped spinning the moment his eye met hers. For an ephemeral fragment of time, Tashigi felt a suffocating longing.

A yearning that burned her insides, such a strong desire to be close that it hurt all her bones and made her dizzy.

His gaze didn't seem to want to leave her, but _she_ let her eyes drop. _Always the better fighter_ , she thought.

Tashigi turned and followed Nami as soon as the redhead called out to her.

.

.

.

Incredibly, the day had been so fun and light that Tashigi didn't even notice the hours passing by. The captain had lunch with them, finally having the chance to taste the so famous food from the crew’s cook and it tasted so good that she wanted to cry. During Navy training, she wasn’t fortunate enough to have delicious meals every day, so she took advantage of that to make up for all these past years.

Sanji seemed happy to see her eat his food and Tashigi spared no compliments. Zoro told her to not spoil him, but she just rolled her eyes. The cook tended to be a ladies man, but as soon as she managed to tame him (" _Tashigi-chan, how did you do that?! You need to teach me and Robin or join us!!"_ ), she realized that he was a sweet guy. And much easier to talk to than Zoro.

Right after the feast, she and the crew were so stuffed that they ended up just lying on the deck grass, talking about random things and listening to the songs coming out of Brook's violin. Tashigi partially listened to some of the conversations, occasionally adding bits of her opinion, but cautiously. It’s true that they were in a brief ceasefire and she was on another (pirate) ship with another (pirate) captain, but that would not be a reason for her not to practice her good manners.

In the midst of so many conversations, Tashigi got distracted by the clouds passing by and taking different forms across the clear sky and pondered how unpredictable life was, just like the weather. She and Smoker have always been in a relentless chase after the Straw Hats, but at this very moment, she was lying beside the said enemies, chatting about absolutely nothing important. The irony of it all wasn't lost on her.

When she least expected it, she felt a presence near her, heard the sound of swords being removed and rested on the floor and soon after, sensed someone laying beside her. Tashigi had her eyes closed, inviting the sunlight to bathe any part of her body that was uncovered, but she didn't need to open them to know that Roronoa Zoro had chosen to approach her.

She could feel that he was considerably close because she could hear his breathing. Tashigi started to focus only on the slight inhalation and exhalation of Zoro's chest and it wasn't long before all the noise from the rest of the Straw Hats started to get muffled.

Suddenly, she heard a strong but quiet voice. "Kuina."

"Huh?", Tashigi frowned with her eyes still closed.

"She's the one who you look like. And not just in appearance, unfortunately."

She heard him sigh and remembered something he said to her a long time ago.

_"I don’t like your very existence! Listen! Your face! It looks like my friend’s who died a long time ago! On top of that, you are saying the same thing she used to say! Don’t imitate her, you copycat woman!”_

Finally, Tashigi was able to name who he accused of imitating. She opened her eyes, turned to face him and realized that he was already watching her with an expression she couldn't read. Hurt? Sadness? Anguish?

_Kuina._

"She's the biggest reason I want to become the best swordsman in the world", he raised his hand to the sky and then closed his fist, "I made that promise the day before she died. Kuina was my friend and my rival and that was her dream. You call me a sexist, but the only person I ever wanted to defeat was a girl. I challenged her two thousand one times and have never won."

_Roronoa Zoro's biggest rival was a girl. He has never beat her._

It took her a while to register his words and then she opened her mouth several times, but all sound refused to come out. So she decided to keep her mouth shut for a few minutes.

In the end, he was right — Tashigi didn’t really know him at all. Kuina, a girl with a name so similar to hers, was Zoro's best friend and from the way the swordsman spoke, she must have been _extraordinary_. A poor girl who lost her life at such a young age and was deprived of her biggest dream. How cruel life can be? If she was alive, how strong could she be now? Maybe she'd be someone that Zoro could fight on an equal footing, or who knows, he could have continuously been defeated by this girl. Someone to compete for the title of the best swordsman in the world.

Tashigi couldn't help feeling a pang of jealousy at the far corner of her heart. So, there really was someone that Zoro wasn’t able to defeat and it was a simple girl. And the captain, at twenty-four years old, was nowhere near that goal. Perhaps Kuina was born for this, with a willpower imprinted on her since she was a baby. Tashigi can’t say whether she believed in the divine or not, but it's something she has always considered to be true: some are born with a stronger spirit than others.

Tashigi had a feeling that maybe hers wasn't strong enough.

But soon, a wave of pride took the jealousy away and filled her entire chest for knowing that there was an incredible swordswoman in the world. She might not be here anymore, but she _existed_. Tashigi smiled and wished that fate had not been so hateful with this girl because she wanted to have met her.

She looked at him and Zoro's eye were closed and his fist was clenched in his chest.

_It must be painful for him to look at me._

Tashigi fought the urge to hold his hand. She could feel Zoro's sadness and anguish and wanted to comfort him, despite knowing how wrong that was.

_Kuina was really important to him._

Eventually, she said, "I'm really sorry, Roronoa. But… what an irony, isn't it?"

"Huh?", Zoro turned to her with a wary glance.

"I look like her and one of my biggest goals in life is to defeat you", she turned her face to look at the clear sky above them again. Tashigi felt her eyes prickle with tears that she wouldn’t let it fall and clenched her fists tightly. She wouldn’t cry in front of him, she wouldn’t give any more reasons for him to look down on her. _I really want to defeat you_.

"Why the hell do you want to beat me so badly?", Zoro gaped dumbfounded and had a truly curious expression.

Tashigi pretended to think a little, but the truth had been on the tip of her tongue for months.

"Because you are the best swordsman I have ever met", she sincerely answered.

"…you do know Mihawk, right?", Zoro raised his good eye's eyebrow and asked suspiciously. Did he really think she was that ill-informed?

"I know and he must be incredible, for sure", Tashigi rolled her eyes and had another impulse, "But it's not _you_."

The captain stared at him intensely because, in the end, she was unable to keep it to herself. As Zoro has never been one to accept defeat, he kept her gaze locked on his. The sounds muffled in her ears because the only thing she could hear was his breathing and her heart beating frantically.

The strange longing was squeezing her heart now and it was starting to hurt.

And in a second, all this eternity that she seemed to be trapped in ended with Nami's voice calling out for her to start preparations for the party. Tashigi admitted defeat ( _How long is this man going to beat me?_ ) and looked anywhere but at him. With a quick movement, she stood up, but unfortunately, her legs gave out shortly after. In the blink of an eye, Zoro was at her side with one hand on her back and the other holding her arm.

He was considerably close and she had the ridiculous idea that, if he wasn’t supporting her weight, that proximity would make her legs give in again.

But they didn't. She meekly thanked and headed for the girls' room.

Nami and Robin really had everything ready — clothes ( _Not dress again… but at least I won't need to wear high heels_ ), makeup and hair. The two chose a simple dress without any print, blue like the color of her hair, which left the shoulders naked and went up to a few centimeters before the knees. The skirt was very loose and Tashigi felt beautiful. Nami had other more daring dresses — one with a huge V-neckline, which showed only a little bit of the breasts to feed the imagination of men like Sanji; another that had a side slit that went up to the decent limit of the thighs, another that left her back and shoulders completely bare and Tashigi was surprised to like this one in particular, but the scar on her back was recent and for some reason, she didn’t feel comfortable.

Nami lend a boot with minimal heels and Robin tied Tashigi's hair in an elegant braid. When she looked at herself in the mirror, she felt truly beautiful — a somewhat unusual feeling for the captain. Tashigi was a swordswoman and a marine, all her confidence was literally embedded in her work and her beliefs.

Her job demanded of her to be strong, not sexy. So her standard uniform was simple, with no need to show more skin than necessary ( _How do Nami-san and Robin-san manage?_ ), but with a personal touch of femininity. But other than that, she didn't know if there was space to feel beautiful.

"You look very pretty, Tashigi-chan", Robin looked at her reflex in the mirror with a kind smile.

"T-Thank you. Really", she adjusted her glasses and blushed.

Tashigi almost jumped when a wild Nami ran out of the bathroom, all naked and agitated. _What is the problem of these women with modesty?_

"Nami-san, use a towel!", the captain waved her hands in exasperation.

"Okaaaaay, Tashigi-chan, you don’t need to be embarrassed, because what I have, you have it too. I'm a little late, but there's time! Tashigi-chan, help me with the dress and Robin with the hair!!"

Tashigi just put her hand on her forehead and sighed, Robin just laughed.

.

.

.

As the Sunny didn’t support the number of people working in the G-5, much to Smoker's sadness and anger, the celebration was held on the Navy ship itself. When Tashigi, Nami, and Robin arrived, everyone was already on the deck celebrating, drinking and toasting. There was no specific decoration, just a banner with the phrase _"thank you for saving Zoro and I'm glad you're better, four-eyes-marine-lady"_ and right next to it, a very rough drawing of a straw hat.

_He's really bad at drawing and I don't know how Roronoa let that one slide._

Tashigi was met with a barrage of questions and compliments from her subordinates ( _"Captain-chan, are you okay?"_ , _"How are you feeling today, Captain-chan?"_ , _"You look spectacularly elegant today, Captain-chan!!"_ ), all a little drunk, but no less sincere.

She just grinned and said that everything was okay and then they all toasted one more time. Tashigi looked around, looking at each part of the celebration with a slight smile on his face. Things were not going well around the world, with all the trouble with the World Government and the war against the Emperors, but at least for one night, everyone who was present deserved a break.

Luffy had a crowd around him, as usual — several of her G-5 men, Usopp, Chopper, and Nami who walked to his side as soon as she arrived — all laughing at some nonsense that the captain was telling them. Even if she wanted to, Tashigi could not, in any way, see any trace of malice in the rubber boy. He was transparent and blunt, he wasn’t a cold and calculating person and he was someone who could attract others easily. _How I wish he wasn't just an exception._

The captain looked for Smoker to check if he was okay, since there was a party going on that he was not so inclined to participate on the ship that he was not willing to concede. But she couldn't even contain the surprise of finding the Vice-Admiral chatting lightly with none other than Nico Robin, Franky and Zoro — and having fun!

And by having fun, she meant that he wasn’t frowning and with an angry face.

_But… why is Robin-san so close to Roronoa?_

She saw that he wasn’t wearing the usual green clothes or his haramaki, although the three swords remained on his waist just like Shigure and Yamaoroshi were with her right now. Tashigi watched discreetly for a little while and seeing him only in a dark blue coat, black casual pants and boots made, once again, the image of the fearsome swordsman Roronoa Zoro vanish into thin air and only a handsome young man remain.

He was still a _little_ too close to Robin.

_Let it go, Tashigi._

She looked away because the strange yearning was showing up its face again and the night was too beautiful for her to be pulled into the ocean.

Around her, everyone seemed to be having fun and she was very happy. Whether this was a flaw or not, the captain couldn’t say, but her chest always filled with joy when she saw other people happy, especially if she was partially the provider. The starry sky was beautiful, Brook's music always excellent, Sanji's food spectacular, which just confirmed how talented he was; everything was wonderful, but she was tired. Of course, she was still recovering, but she didn't want to disappoint Luffy. He seemed genuinely happy to see that she was fine.

The party continued and due to some delirium that she thought was caused by the medication she was still taking, Tashigi considered dancing. The captain knew how clumsy she was, but Sanji proved to be an incredibly patient partner. After a few attempts, she was able to maintain a decent pace, which ended up encouraging her to invite others — she danced a few times with some of her men, once with Usopp and Chopper, with Luffy and finally, twice more with Sanji.

But not Zoro. Never Zoro.

Something told her that he was watching her, but at no time did she even turn to face him. She preferred to focus on being successful with the simple act of dancing and not embarrass herself in front of everyone. _Especially_ in front of him.

Inevitably, she got tired — her legs started to hurt, the air started to run out and her head started to throb with a certain insistence. She felt tired and somehow, it wasn't just physically. Tashigi was a natural wallflower and dancing freely was not common to shy people. Being the center of attention was also not part of her routine outside of work due to her clumsy nature. That’s why, during her entire life, when it was necessary, she knew how to be invisible.

Then, without anyone noticing, she blended in the background and left discreetly. She just needed a little time to recover. She found an empty spot on the railing and watched the sea. The night was really so beautiful, the vast sea so serene, the cheerful atmosphere gave the impression that she was trapped inside a drop of happiness slowly falling into the ocean.

When it touched the surface, reality would come to light.

They would all go back to the war being fought all around the world, those smiles would be replaced by painful expressions, she wouldn’t see the Straw Hats for a long time. She wouldn’t have the chance to cross blades with Zoro in a friendly way, for the first time in all these years they know each other.

"Nintoryu suits you."

Tashigi was startled and almost tripped.

"What—? W-Why the hell do you keep scaring me out of nowhere?"

"You’re just easily scared", Zoro raised an eyebrow and smiled sarcastically.

"I'm not easily scared! You're the one who's too weird!"

"Haa? I'm not weird, woman!!", Zoro just snorted and crossed his arms.

Tashigi rolled her eyes and cast him a disapproving look. The swordsman leaned on the railing just like her and they fell into a pleasant silence. But eventually, she wanted to speak. 

"I feel that I have more stability with Nintoryu", Tashigi exhaled and didn’t look at him, but she felt that the pirate was staring at her.

"Why did you decide to use it?"

"Because I wanted to hurt you and if it helped me, then I didn't care", she looked down and remembered, sadly, the time when all of her insides were consumed by anger.

"I'm here and you're not trying to hurt me."

"Yes, but I've hurt others in the process. It wasn't just because of you, but I let violence take over me for several reasons."

Tashigi finally looked at him and found Zoro's eye wide open. "Surprised?", she asked.

"I didn't think Captain Nice would be capable of that."

"I don't know if you noticed, but I'm a member of the military, Roronoa. Being violent is not part of my job, but supposing that I would never have to get my hands bloody is prepotent on your part", Tashigi looked at him coldly out of the corner of her eyes. _Even in a truce, he still irritates me with this contempt for me._

Zoro narrowed his eye slightly for a fraction of a second and then immediately turned his attention to the sea in front of them. The silence became heavy, but she had no desire to solve this problem. Deep down, Tashigi just wanted to settle down somewhere. Social interactions for a long time consumed her too much.

"Captain four-eyes."

"Mmm?"

"Wanna get out of here?"

Now it was her turn to widen her eyes. The heart began to pound without a break and the voices became muffled. What he had said opened up a range of meanings (and possibilities), one more different than the other. But one in particular came to her mind and she swallowed.

_It sounds like a date._

Tashigi promptly dismissed the idea. She didn't know if Roronoa Zoro was that type of man, but if he was, it certainly wouldn't be with her.

_But if it's not a date, why not accept it?_

"I do."

"We can go back to Sunny", Zoro just tilted his head thoughtfully.

She opened her mouth a little because the air was knocked out of her lungs. She thought he was talking about going to another, more isolated location on the Navy ship itself and Tashigi had the absurd idea that Zoro could clearly hear her heartbeat because it was galloping loudly inside her ribcage. However, she forced herself to appear confused and somewhat aloof.

"W-What do you mean? Don't you want to get drunk?"

"Are you calling me a boozer?", Zoro squinted.

"I have seen you drink and I can say with one hundred percent certainty that you are a boozer."

"You annoying woman, now you just wanna make fun of me, don't you? At least I don't stumble left and right", Zoro crossed his arms and smiled smugly at her.

"What—!! At least I don't get lost every ten seconds", Tashigi challenged him with a look and poked his chest.

"Haaa? It's impossible to get lost in that short time, idiot!"

"Okay then. I'll let you guide us back to Sunny", she crossed her arms. The defiant look refused to leave her face.

Zoro pressed his lips together in a thin line.

'That's what I thought."

.

.

.

For some reason, escaping was not complicated — people were so caught up in drinking that they didn't even notice a woman in a blue dress and a man with green hair walking in sync to the next boat in the middle of a crowd that was also partying near the harbor.

Tashigi thanked the frantic movement of the bars nearby and people talking loudly and strolling because it helped to distract her. That way she would be able to prevent all the blood from rushing to her face and she wouldn't lose her god damn mind.

_It looks like a date it looks like a date it looks like a date._

Of course, she has already been on dates (although in very few), but Tashigi was still very inexperienced. But this was not a date. It was nothing. Nothing at all. She knew it _wasn't_ a date, but she didn't know what to do with the fact that she was surprised that she wanted it to be.

_Why? Roronoa is a pirate. There is no dating between a pirate and a marine._

_It is not a date it is not a date it is not a date._

The two walked on the same frequency, with the sound of footsteps accompanying her heartbeat. The mere distance of centimeters between both of their shoulders caused them to bump into each other due to the number of people coming and going.

_But we could train. It's not considered a date._

Tashigi glanced at Zoro and realized how relaxed he looked, walking with his hands inside his pockets and just looking straight ahead, dodging drunken and naughty women who threw themselves at him, with all the sensuality the night allowed. On one of those times when she was distracted watching him, a strange man grabbed her by the waist and pulled her to glue his body with hers.

"Hey pretty girl, wanna come have fun with us—"

Tashigi was startled and already had her hands on Shigure's sheath when she felt a blade pass over her shoulder and stop inches from her attacker's throat. She looked out of the corner of her eyes and recognized the aura of the sword that protected her.

 _Enma_.

"How about you release the girl before I slice you all up?"

She knew that Zoro never draws Enma without a specific reason. He was still in the process of mastering it completely. Maybe he drew the nearest one? However, the swordsman's intimidating aura was enough for the guy to release Tashigi in the blink of an eye and run away with his tail between his legs.

Zoro sheathed his sword and she turned to face him. "Roronoa, I could—!"

"I know you could have defended yourself. It was just… reflex."

Zoro smoothed his hair and then immediately tucked his hand into his pants pockets again. It took her a while to what he had just said sink in and when she understood the _possible_ meaning, her mind started to float. _A reflex of protecting me?_ , she thought.

If Tashigi didn’t pay attention that night, the ocean would pull her and pull her hard.

"It's okay… I appreciate it."

Zoro just nodded and started walking towards their ship once again. Tashigi followed his pace easily as if she has always been there, as if she had been doing it for a long time.

_It is not a date it is not a date it is not a date._

As soon as they stepped on Sunny, Zoro stopped and turned to her with an _amused_ expression.

"Wanna train?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like Kuina, Tashigi's name comes from a bird that doesn’t fly.


	7. terrifying

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So. Yeah. Really sorry that I took so long to update. And with the delay, it comes a big chapter, so at least I made up for it? .-.

_"Wanna train?"_

Tashigi frowned and blinked a few times, not believing what he had just asked. She swallowed once, twice but still didn't know what to do. Among all the countless possibilities that Zoro could suggest for the two of them to do, she didn't think he would actually choose to _train_.

"S-Sure. Why not?"

Zoro gave her a lopsided smile, but for some reason, she didn't see arrogance or any form of contempt. In her eyes, it even looked… charming.

_I don't like the destination to where my mind is wandering._

"I've never posed a true challenge for you, but today I will pose even less. I'm still feeling a little weak, as you well know."

"Oh! True, true", Zoro scratched his chin thoughtfully, "We can just… Um, dunno, train together and not duel."

He looked away and didn't seem quite sure what he had just said.

"N-No. It's okay. I can handle it."

Zoro raised an eyebrow and the way his mouth twisted indicated that he was impressed, but Tashigi just stared at him. Then he nodded for her to follow him — she didn't know Sunny completely but knew that the swordsman had his own training space.

"You have a technique of drawing the sword better than mine, but your footing hinders your attack or defense."

Tashigi widened her eyes so much to the point she thought they would fall out of its sockets. First of all, Roronoa Zoro just praised her and second of all, Roronoa Zoro just gave her advice so she could get better. This night couldn’t get any weirder.

"Draw your sword."

"Any in particular?"

"Haa? Whatever, woman", he tilted his head innocently. Tashigi nodded and put her hand on Shigure.

"What's the name of the other?"

"Yamaoroshi."

"Then pick this one. I already know Shigure."

She was startled and opened her mouth, surprised, but the sound died in the middle of her throat. Her hesitation was lost on his back when he turned around to remove his coat, staying only with the white T-shirt that was underneath. _Did he remember Shigure's name?_ , she wondered. Still, she pulled out Yamaoroshi and listened to what he had to say. She positioned her feet the way he instructed and went into defense mode. Zoro unsheathed Wado Ichimonji and Tashigi frowned. _Wado is the sword he puts in his mouth. I never saw him fight with it._ But the pirate didn't give her time to think about why. He attacked her quickly and Tashigi stuck her feet on the ground to defend herself.

She would be capable. She had defended herself from his blows before and would defend again, even wearing a dress.

Initially, she had some problems predicting where he would attack from, and Zoro always reduced the force applied when she got lost. But as time passed, she managed to keep up with him and with observation haki, she was able to get used to his attack pattern. The defenses became more accurate and she swears she saw him smile playfully. _Is he mocking me?_

But after almost an hour, a misstep caused the training session to end abruptly. Although as skilled as she was with a sword in hand, Tashigi stumbled and sure enough, her face would be on the floor in seconds if it weren't for a soft wall, one hand on her waist and the other on her arm. Quickly, she raised her head and squeaked softly.

Zoro's face wasn’t at a safe distance.

In fact, the two of them were not at a safe distance _at all_.

And the warmth that emanated from the palm of his hand spread over her arm, went up to her bare shoulders and settled on her face. Tashigi blushed furiously and something, deep down, told her that she should step back — that’s what she _should_ do. But his eye never leaving hers made the captain's feet glue to the floor.

_What are you thinking, Roronoa?_

Because of the height difference, the peculiar vision that Tashigi had was of the curve of Zoro's neck and that was distracting her for some unknown reason. But this time, she finally managed to confirm that the other smell that emanated from him was really cinnamon. Soft sea smell and cinnamon. It was an unusual combination, but it was so _him_. Tashigi released a breath that she didn't realize she was holding and it didn't go unnoticed by her how the hand that held her waist jerked for a second.

So it was up to Zoro to _really_ put a safe distance between the two. She straightened up and tried hard not to think about how the hand that held her slid down her arm and how for a second, his fingers lingered in her hand. He had no idea that he had left a trail of fire along her arm.

The two weren’t so close anymore, but his deep voice still made her shiver.

"You have to be more careful, marine woman."

"Y-Yes, I k-know. Thanks."

"I think we better stop before you twist your foot."

Tashigi nodded because it would be a lie if she said she could utter something rational at the moment. However, neither of them moved away. Zoro analyzed her — the eye trailed over her face, focusing on the light scar on her eye and then on her neck, looking for signs of a red circle that didn't seem to be there.

"Makeup. Nami-san used it to hide."

He nodded and turned his attention to the eye wound.

"It hurts little. And thanks to Chopper-san's supernatural help, it looks like it will heal fast, as you can see. Although it will leave a light scar", she touched her right eye.

"Mmm."

He looked briefly at her bare shoulder and Tashigi also knew what he was looking for.

_Strange connection._

"This one still hurts, I won't lie. It will heal fast like the one on my face, but the scar won't disappear."

His expression suggested that he wanted to say something, but a second later, he apparently decided not to say anything. So, Zoro laid on the floor in the same way they all did earlier, but Tashigi chose to sit a little far from him. She leaned with her hands behind her and looked at the ceiling. Her heart was still racing, but as long as she didn't look at him, eventually, the beating would return to normal.

When she finally managed to calm down, she spoke again, "You will defeat him. This is a fact."

Tashigi met his confused look, but soon, an understanding was on his face.

"You speak with too much certainty, Captain Glasses."

"You have motivation and is stupidly persevering," she shrugged.

"I'm not strong enough. Yet", Zoro looked at the ceiling.

"Isn't— what— isn’t strong enough? What the hell do you want? Destroy the whole world, you madman?!", Tashigi gestured with her hands, completely dumbfounded. He just laughed out loud.

She stared at him and tried not to focus on how delightful his laugh sounded in her ears. She looked away and wondered if it was worth continuing her train of thought.

_Why not? I can take some time off myself today._

"I… I would like to be alive to witness that."

Zoro raised an eyebrow and asked, sincerely curious, "Haa? And why wouldn't you be alive??"

"A war is approaching, Roronoa. Not all of us are going to have the luxury of getting out of it alive", she took a deep breath.

"And why wouldn't _you_ get out alive, woman?", Zoro narrowed his eyes.

Tashigi shrugged, "I'm not strong enough. Yet."

"Huh—"

"Besides, I'm replaceable. I'm going to fight with everything I have, obviously, but deep down, if I end up dying on the battlefield… what difference does it make? Who's _really_ going to mourn my death?"

_I am not part of something bigger where I am essential. My men and Smoker-san will pull through._

"Family?"

"I do not have. Orphan and without siblings."

"Friends?"

"Very few."

"Boyfriend? Or girlfriend, I don't know what's your preference…", Zoro looked at her quickly and immediately looked away.

"That's something I don't have. Neither boyfriend nor girlfriend", Tashigi adjusted her glasses and tried to hide the redness on her face.

"If you don't come back, who the hell will torment me to fight every time it meets me? I won't have a rival, you idiot", Zoro crossed his arms and gave her a disapproving look.

Tashigi smiled and rolled her eyes.

"I am not and have never been your rival and we both know that. Rivals should be at least at the same level and I'm not yet", for some reason, Tashigi's smile widened, "But don't worry, Roronoa, as soon as you take Mihawk's place, I'm sure you will have a loooot of rivals."

Tashigi laughed wholeheartedly. Zoro did not.

"But it won't be _you_."

The captain stopped laughing abruptly and widened her eyes. Her heart began to gallop frantically inside her ribcage and the walls seemed to be closing around her. _What do you mean it won't be me? What do you mean, Roronoa?_ , she asked herself. Zoro cleared his throat and changed the subject.

"By the way. You have the potential to have a good observation haki. I don't know how the armament is like, but it's good to train them both", he wasn't looking at her and Tashigi didn't want to face him either. She decided to ignore it. _It must be nothing_.

"O-Okay."

"It's hot in here, woman. Wanna go outside?", Zoro asked casually while trying to cool off by messing with his shirt.

"S-Sure."

.

.

.

Incredibly that night had become something like the one they talked to each other until past midnight. Tashigi felt good and felt light. Roronoa wasn’t annoying her and she wasn’t second-guessing his words.

Eventually, Zoro offered her sake and Tashigi thought twice before accepting it. She weighed the pros and cons of getting drunk on a pirate ship with a pirate she swore to capture. But then she forced herself to remember that she was on a day off tonight and that, in fact, she knew how to hold her liquor ( _maybe not as much as Nami-san_ , but she did), so she thought _why not?_

It's not like Zoro was going to do anything.

The two walked towards the deck because the crow's nest started to get very hot according to the swordsman. They sat on the deck lawn at an arm's length and leaned against the rail. Normally, it takes a while to Tashigi actually be snatched up by the booze and start laughing like a kid, but apparently, she was already doing it without the help of alcohol — the captain was truly having fun and laughing at the stories Zoro told about their adventures. He laughed out loud along with her and Tashigi felt that longing tighten her chest again. Now and then, the dark-haired girl watched him from the corner of her eye, always looking away when he turned in her direction.

"I swear this Davy Back Fight shit was the dumbest thing I've ever had to do in my entire life. But seeing the swirly eyebrow use a ball on his head won my day."

Tashigi could imagine Sanji going through this shame and still having to collaborate with Zoro to win a match. It must have been pure gold. Their laughter slowly died and then, Zoro took a long drink of the sake and the captain looked at him. _Really_ looked at him. She looked beyond the undoubtedly attractive appearance, beyond the always attentive eye, beyond the short hair and the three earrings — she looked at the fact that Zoro was strangely good. Difficult to deal with, but good.

Before she could control herself, she blurted out one of the first confessions she would make that night.

"I think that, in the end, you all are my exception."

Zoro stopped drinking to give her a confused look.

"Smoker-san likes you too, but you didn't hear from me, okay?", she chuckled and Zoro smiled, "We'll continue to chase you, obviously, but nowadays I know it's just a facade. I don't think we would be able to arrest you with a clear conscience anyway."

The swordsman nodded and offered a sip of the sake without saying anything. She snatched it from his hand and took into her mouth (not caring about stupid things like "indirect kissing" — the captain didn't really give a damn about the beliefs of thirteen-year-old girls); the drink came down hot and she saw stars behind her eyelids. She handed it back to him and Zoro rested his arm on the raised leg. Tashigi didn’t know what he was thinking and didn’t know if she was already starting to get drunk because soon after, the words came out easily again.

"What are you thinking?", she asked in a very low voice and was impressed by how he managed to hear her in the midst of so much noise coming from the harbor. Zoro looked away and after a moment, spoke again, while leaning his head against the openings in the rail. He approached her and the distance between the two narrowed to the size of a forearm. Tashigi began to entwine her fingers discreetly, doing her best not to show the nervousness that emerged in the pit of her stomach.

"You looked very comfortable with swirly eyebrows."

"Ah! Y-Yes", Tashigi was taken by surprise, but his calm tone relaxed her, "He was very patient with me while I stepped on his foot again and again."

She rubbed the back of her neck and laughed sheepishly. Zoro just snorted, annoyed. "He's always like that with women, a pain in the ass and—"

"Aaaand you like him anyway", Tashigi rolled her eyes and smiled sarcastically, enjoying the expression of discomfort and pure shame that appeared on his face.

"What—"

"You two have a very funny relationship. I didn't even have to spend so much time here to realize that you like and respect one another, but are not able to say it to each other's face."

"O-Oe, I-I don't like that idiot—", Zoro looked outraged but was blushing. Tashigi couldn't help herself and snickered, making him more sulky.

"Yes, you do. And I know you respect his strength", she said in a friendly tone as soon as she calmed down. Zoro just made a disapproving noise and took a deep breath, flexing his fingers. She was pretty sure he was about to tell her a secret and was just getting ready. Not that she paid any attention to his gestures. No. It was nothing like that.

"He's strong. It's not easy to fight only with the legs", Zoro spoke with resignation and sincerity. She sensed that he was not saying that out of spite — Tashigi knew that there was never an ounce of lies in the swordsman's veins.

"Yes. It's really impressive," she nodded and he agreed.

Then the marine looked at the ship they were on — Sunny emanated freedom, a place full of adventures and stories. And full of love, she wouldn't be able to deny it. Such a sincere place also deserved something honest from inside her heart. She wanted to leave a little piece of her soul there.

"I think if someday, for some ludicrous reason, I become a pirate… I think you would be the only crew I would like to join."

Zoro turned his face towards her suddenly and narrowly missed his head on the rail wood. After a second, he mumbled something that she couldn't hear because it was at the very moment that very strange (and inconvenient) fireworks started to set off from the G-5 ship.

However, it looked a lot like _“Then come”_.

"What—?!", Tashigi frowned very hard and had to speak louder because of all the noise. _Did I hear what I heard?_

"Nothing!"

"I'm sorry… what did you say? I couldn’t hear!"

"I said it's nothing, you nerd!", Zoro spoke a little louder so that she could hear him too and then cast an angry look at her indicating that the matter was closed.

Tashigi nodded and did not insist. _Maybe he said "Don't even come". Yeah, that must have been it_ , she thought. Zoro's eye was fixed on the beautiful fireworks in the sky, full of life and colors — purple, blue, red, yellow — but it was the green of his hair that completely captivated her at that moment. Zoro no longer seemed irritated — quite the contrary, he had a small smile while the sparkle of the fireworks reflected in his eye, and Tashigi could tell that there was a certain beauty in those few minutes that she watched him shamelessly, without blinking.

_Ah. This is it._

The captain was so immersed that she didn't even register the moment when Zoro turned again to look at her. He frowned, putting on a curious expression. Then he raised his eyebrows in an innocent surprise.

"Ah! So, did you decide to stop chasing me?"

"Hmmm. Perhaps?", she looked around, thoughtful.

"So the nerd doesn't want to confiscate my swords anymore?", Zoro raised an eyebrow and scoffed, "What a shame. I was almost getting used to it."

"So don't be used to it anymore. Idiot", Tashigi pouted and crossed her arms. However, the double meaning did not go unnoticed by her. Zoro just laughed playfully, "You take good care of them. I don't… I don't have to confiscate them."

He looked at her with sheer surprise on his face and Tashigi just shook her head. Then, unbelievably, the surprise became recognition and finally, pride. Zoro rested his cheek on his hand and offered her a sweet look. The fires were still lighting the sky and in addition, the swordsman's hair in a graceful way, leaving the green more alive than ever.

Since the fireworks display began, she was almost certain that her heart was in sync with the explosions.

Out of nowhere, the bars also decided to set off fireworks of their own as if they were competing with the Straw Hat pirates and G-5 sailors. Zoro and Tashigi exchanged a confused look and heard the drunks shouting at her ship — _"we are not pirates, but we also know how to party, you piece of shits!! Don’t underestimate the common citizen!!"_

It was enough for them to burst out laughing while slightly uglier fires exploded in the sky. They were a little bland and without defined patterns — nothing like those at her party, which were in the shape of a lotus or in the shape of various animals (even a monkey) — but it was enough to light up Zoro's face while he laughed. The sound was wonderful and reverberated through her, passing through her entire body and leaving her at peace. Tashigi wondered if she was finally being taken by the alcohol.

"Thank you, four-eyes", he wiped the tears from the corners of his eye and she did the same.

_That's what bothered me when Robin was in his bed._

But at that very moment, a red flag inside her head told her to run. Something terrifying was coming and Tashigi was afraid. She needed to get out of there, run, disappear, anything.

_That's what made me happy when we talked until midnight._

"I already talked about many classified matters today. I better go”, she swallowed hard and stood up. Her breathing started to become short and her palms were sweaty. _Forget. That’s not it. Run away._

"Already?", Zoro showed a downcast face for just two seconds, before pulling himself together and putting his hand on his chin, assuming the usual presumptuous posture, "Good that I have something to use against you in case I need it, four-eyes."

"YOU—! HAVE YOU RECORDED ANYTHING?", Tashigi turned to him in a swift movement, gaping and wide-eyed. Zoro just stuck his tongue out.

"WHO KNOWS!"

"RORONOA…!!", Tashigi growled menacingly, but Zoro rolled his eye.

"No, you nerd. Your secrets are safe with me."

And then, for no reason, he gifted her with a toothy and sincere grin. As if all that time they spent together under a sky full of stars and fireworks was a day-to-day thing — as if he was just joking with a friend. Tashigi had the preposterous idea that perhaps she had been transported to a parallel universe.

And that she wanted to stay there.

_That's what scared me when he said that I needed him._

"Okay… so I'm going now. T-Thank you for… for the fun night, Roronoa", she bowed slightly in education and turned around to get away from him and go back to her life where she didn't have to face him or hear his voice every day.

Roronoa Zoro, on the other hand, did not seem to share her idea. In a super-fast movement, he was at her side with his hand clasped gently around her wrist. She shivered and turned slowly.

"You didn't dance with me", Zoro's expression was difficult to read, but his jaw was clenched.

Tashigi blinked once, twice and the third time, she questioned, "W-What?"

"You danced with a lot of people, but not with me", Zoro looked to his side and released her, putting his hands inside his pocket, "Danced three times with the pervert…" 

"Huh? Do you seriously want to compete with Sanji-san even on this?", Tashigi took a deep breath and pinched the bridge of her nose. _That can't be possible_ , "Just accept that he wins this one without any effort."

"Haa?! You always talk about things you don't know!!", the swordsman grimaced and leaned over to challenge her.

"Oh? I didn't think Roronoa Zoro could dance", Tashigi crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow, "Come on, show me your moves so I can laugh at you openly."

Zoro pressed his lips in a thin line and narrowed his eyes. Then the air around him changed — he got serious then straightened up and looked her straight in the eye. There was something there that showed determination and Tashigi shuddered with anticipation.

"Dance with me then."

_What?_

_What??_

Tashigi forced herself to focus on his words. _Okay, it's just a dance. It's just a dance._

"H-Huh? B-But t-there's no music, R-Roronoa."

"Do you know how to sing? If you don’t, then whatever", Zoro just shrugged, completely aloof.

_That's what gave me hope when he noticed my absence for two months._

"I-I know h-how to sing."

"Oh? Are you sure? So come on, sing something so I can laugh at you openly, neeeerd", he repeated the mocking expression she had just made. Tashigi stepped on his feet on purpose and Zoro just let out a _"hey! That hurts!"_.

"Any particular one?"

"A slow one."

Tashigi swallowed, but complied anyway. Singing was one of the few things the captain liked to do in her spare time. It was something she was really good at and there has never had a time when she didn't feel confident while lyrics and song melodies were coming out of her mouth. Then she searched her mind for some music that was suitable for a slower dance and found one she liked a lot. Tashigi cleared her throat and began to sing softly, a little uncertain. She had her eyes closed while she still got the tones right and when she did, her voice came out soft and completely in tune. Tashigi was satisfied with that melody.

_“Can't seem to hold you like I want to_

_So I can feel you in my arms_

_Nobody's gonna come and save you_

_We pulled too many false alarms.”_

When she least expected it, the swordswoman felt a hand pulling her by the waist. She opened her eyes at once and found Zoro wearing the same sweet look he had offered her minutes before. She was startled and clamped her mouth shut tightly. The pirate just took her other hand and pulled her close so she'd fit perfectly in the curve of his neck. Then he spoke in her ear and his voice was hoarse and so close that it made Tashigi feel as if she had been struck by lightning.

"Keep singing, four-eyes."

She shook her head, rested her free hand on Zoro's shoulder and found her voice again.

_“We're goin' down_

_And you can see it too_

_We're goin' down_

_And you know that we're doomed_

_My dear_

_We're slow dancing in a burnin' room.”_

And in a smooth and calm rhythm, they danced and Tashigi couldn’t even remember that he was able to evoke turbulent waves within her. She was so calm that she didn’t step once on Zoro's foot as he led her and the pirate, in turn, was true to his word — he really knew how to dance and the easiness with which he slowly swayed her at the sound of her own voice emanated a charm that didn't even seem to belong to him.

He was warm and Tashigi's head was spinning.

When the song ended, the dance ended as well. The captain had her eyes closed and remained close to him for reasons she could not explain. Maybe because the temperature started to cool down and he was warm. _Yes, maybe that's it_.

Zoro laughed and she felt the reverberation in her own chest.

"Well, you're not bad at singing."

She opened her eyes suddenly and pulled away enough to scowl at him. Zoro was still smiling and she decided she was going to let it pass this time. She pouted and spoke, annoyed.

"Yeah, you're not bad at dancing, either."

Zoro had not yet released her waist, and the captain no longer knew what to do with her heart. But there was an itch under her skin, almost reaching her flesh, that if she let it take over, it would probably know what to do with her hands. Or with her lips.

Equally dangerous.

"Woman. Umm. You. You’re not bad today", he indicated her dress with his hand.

"A-Ah… thanks, I-I guess. I-I think I didn't look bad with a scar on my eye and my back", Tashigi laughed, a little embarrassed.

"If the scar on your eye bothers you, buy an eye patch", the swordsman frowned and spoke seriously.

"So I finally look like a real pirate?"

"Heh. I think it's a sign."

"What—!! You buy yourself an eye patch! Take the opportunity and buy a parrot too!!", Tashigi pulled away again and slammed a fist on his chest.

"Haaaaa?! You— You annoying woman, I was praising you!! Damn, that's what I get every time I try to be nice to you…", the swordsman scolded her with a vein pulsing on his forehead.

She was supposed to continue with the anger that has always been at her fingertips when it came to him, but the grimace he was making was so funny and being that close seemed so natural and—

_How funny. He's very funny and weird._

Zoro was still complaining and making an ugly face, but she wasn't paying attention anymore. They were so close that she could see the scar on his left eye clearly, the surprisingly delicate eyelashes and light marks between the eyebrows from frowning so much.

_This is it. He is also the ocean._

"Zoro."

"H-H-Huh?", Zoro stopped complaining instantly and raised his eyebrows in pure amazement.

"I'm sorry. You... you are not bad either. Y-You a-are really handsome tonight."

_Ah. This is it._

And Zoro looked at her in such a different way that was enough for Tashigi to wonder if it wasn't just the reflection of her own gaze. He had no idea of the courage she had to muster to admit so many things in one night and if anyone asked, she would blame the booze. But for herself, internally, at her very core… her feelings were finally clear as a sunny day.

_This is it. Somewhere along the way, I fell in love with Roronoa Zoro._

Zoro pulled her by the waist again and the ocean finally swallowed her.

The words never came out and she couldn't even protest before she felt the wall at her back, a hand on the back of her neck and his lips on hers. For a few seconds, Tashigi didn't know what to do — she couldn't even register in her brain what was happening at that moment and her hands were suspended in the air out of surprise.

It hadn't even passed forty minutes since she was, once again, inside Zoro's personal space, but this time she could feel everything — the muscles in his arms that were tightly around her waist in a strangely possessive way, his ribs pressing insistently against her breasts, hips to hips, glued together, and none of this seemed casual. And again, she should step away, that's what she needed to do.

An hour ago it had been an accident and it had a certain element of surprise, so it was understandable that Tashigi _knew_ what to do, but didn't know _how_ to react. The dance, on the other hand, was his request and she, of her own free will, accepted. No problem, after all, she danced with several people that night.

However, now she had no excuse. The closeness shouldn't take her by surprise and she already knew it was wrong. It was wrong and abominable. Roronoa Zoro was a pirate, a natural enemy, and this truce they were in might not last long, after all, the desire to get to know him was simply a whim on her part. Who knows, maybe they could have a purely friendly relationship from now on, but intertwining the way they were doing, without a millimeter of distance, was not correct.

She should step away.

But the thought died when Tashigi closed her eyes and unconsciously opened her mouth. Zoro understood and it wasn't even five seconds before one tongue found the other and she let out a gasp that shouldn't have escaped. The initial astonishment dissipated and the hands that she did not know what to do until then, pulled and lifted part of his shirt so that she could feel the _so so warm_ skin that it was underneath.

Zoro shuddered and gasped. Tashigi didn't know if it was because of her slightly cold hands or because they started wandering — counting his vertebrae, running down the underside of his huge scar, feeling the curve of his neck. There was _nothing_ casual about them anymore.

No kiss she'd ever received would ever beat this one. Despite all the intensity, every slight tug on her lips, every time his hand left her waist and went up and down her back, Zoro was being kind and respectful. At any moment did he exceeded any alarming boundary, except the one the two of them had just broken together.

They were out in the open, with random sounds coming from everywhere — drunken people shouting, the happy music that echoed up to them from the G-5 ship, women singing in a karaoke bar, the noise of spaced conversations — but Tashigi could only hear the heartbeat in her ears and the strange sound of when one mouth kisses another.

She couldn't step away. Because, like him, Tashigi liked sake, but decided that he tasted better. Often, the drink made her forget her own existence and left her numb, but there, in his arms, she was wide awake and electrified. _Much better than sake, much more addictive._ Then she arched her back, pressing herself harder, wanting to pass all that electrifying pleasure from inside her to him. Zoro's breath caught and she let herself believe that he felt it too because something seemed to encourage him to tilt her face even more and kiss her more fervently until the taste of him was etched on her lips and Tashigi shouldn't let out any more noise, but a soft moan came out and—

"Umm", the sound of Nico Robin clearing her throat echoed in Tashigi's ears and she opened her eyes in fright, "Sorry to interrupt, but Luffy asked us to get more barrels of booze."

Zoro also opened his eye and broke the kiss as if she was fire and he was burning. For a few seconds, the two looked at each other and the captain thought she saw his pupil fully dilated and something uncontrollable in his eye. The seconds ended and Zoro turned towards a slightly surprised Robin and a gaping Sanji, with his cigarette lying on the floor.

The swordsman still held her by the waist and the two were still completely sunk in the wall, Tashigi so close and so bewildered. Now she should really walk away, but she would be lying if she said she had all her mental faculties in place. Then Zoro released her, swallowed hard and spoke — each word a stab in her chest.

"I… I'm sorry. Just… forget about this."

_Forget? I don't know if I can forget. How can you ask me that?_

And there it was the feeling of rejection in the form of tears that she would not let it fall.

"I need to go."

Tashigi just looked away from him and walked towards the exit, passing by Robin and Sanji, without looking back.

.

.

.

.

And even after fifteen days, nothing Tashigi did was able to make her forget how warm Zoro was that day or how good she felt when he held her around her waist or how much the feel of his skin under the palm of her hands only stoke more and more the fire inside her, bubbling and bubbling, making the aching between her legs increase and hurt and she knew there was only one way to satiate that hunger—

_I hate you I hate you I hate you._

Sometimes she felt disgusted, but only when his name escaped in a sigh and all the pressure was expelled from her as if a gigantic wave was washing over her, Tashigi could think clearly. There was no turning back now, he was intoxicating and the fact that she couldn't get him out of her brain was equally intoxicating.

_I can't hate you anymore._

There wasn't a night she didn’t spend like that, with Zoro giving and taking away her sanity, even after hearing again from the mouth of her own tormentor (now sober), by den den mushi, that everything was really just a mistake. A mistake that cost her a lot and maybe nothing to him.

_“I'm sorry, Captain Glasses. It's my fault and I shouldn't have done what I did. I knew that we had already drunk a lot and even so, I acted that way. I hope you forgive me. It was a lack of character on my part. ”_

_“O-Oh. I-I see. It was my fault, too.”_

_"So we good?"_

_"Y-Yes."_

Then, one night, lying in her bed, curled up under the covers after a hard day at work; she stared at her bedroom ceiling for hours on end, silently humming the melody of the slow music they danced and Tashigi really felt an unusual fear — a fear that had never coursed through her veins, poisoning her mind.

_How terrifying is to like you this much._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Zoro is such a shy schoolboy. (≖ ͜ʖ≖) 
> 
> The music is Slow Dancing in a Burning Room by John Mayer. I find this song amazing to slow dance. (￣ω￣)
> 
> And yes, let me have the headcanon that Zoro knows how to dance and Tashigi knows how to sing.
> 
> Hope you guys liked the chapter!


	8. deceiver

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huge apologies for the delay and this chapter was a little tricky (and probably the next too) because I wanted to try my hand in some fighting scenes. I already apologize if something might feel off, but well, we gotta practice so we can learn, right?
> 
> Saying that, a quick note: this chapter is basically about Tashigi, but our sexi boi will be back next chapter.
> 
> And if I can give a suggestion, I'd recommend listening to two songs from League of Legends soundtrack (no, I don't actually play, but I love their cinematics and songs) Awake by Valerie Broussard or Warriors by 2WEI feat. Edda Hayes. Those two were basically the ones I listened to while writing this chapter and gave me an extra energy to finish it. :)

It was an ambush. 

Tashigi should have known. She should have known the distress call was fake. She should have known it was a set up. A Vice-Admiral requesting a Buster Call on an island? Out of nowhere? Pretending it was necessary for the destruction of another dictator, and the only solution was to blow everything up?

When did the Navy and the World Government have ever requested the weapon to free an island of an evil dictatorship? They have never done that. They have never cared about that. They'd only use it if powerful and dangerous pirates were involved or if they wanted to hide something. That hurt Tashigi’s soul, but she knew it was true. 

But she didn’t think there was something to hide on such a small island. The other reason, on the other hand, was more realistic — “powerful” and “dangerous” are adjectives easily applied to the Strawhats.

Something in her heart told her they were on that island. It was the closest to the last one where they anchored (she knew because  _ he _ kind of told her), it  _ had _ to be them. She heard some buzz about a group of people helping the people on that island, saving and protecting. It seemed a lot similar to what they usually do.

She knew her heart was right. The Strawhats were, once again, working for the good of others, and the Navy might have gone silent, knowing it was them and waiting for the exact moment to leap and slit their throats. She  _ knew _ it was them. 

Tashigi had to run.

The Captain knew she had to run faster the moment she heard the distress call from the den den mushi. She caught the blatant lie the moment it left Vice-Admiral Azumu's mouth. The marine was a very strong woman, and Tashigi doubted that her fleet wouldn’t be able to end any kind of conflict on any island — the woman was almost Admiral level and, indeed, was only a step from a promotion. 

But Tashigi has never liked the older woman. The Captain always felt uneasy when she was around, like she was being watched the whole time, like the woman might leap out of the shadows and jump right in her jugular out of nowhere. Besides, the Vice-Admiral was known for being extremely ruthless and unforgiving — no pirate who met her had ever come back to tell the story. Azumu was, to put it simply, a merciless human being.

And the most macabre thing about her was her extreme liking for killing.

Tashigi has never understood how a person like that was in the Navy. Or even why. If murdering delighted her, an assassin job would be a better fit, but the Captain thought that maybe the power excited her. So when she heard her voice and her fake desperate call for help, Tashigi knew something bad was coming. 

She was looking at Smoker for a long while, and, in complete silence, they agreed that was not right. They agreed that was not justice. Without even saying a word, they decided what they had to do. Then, the man turned around and changed their route to the island, pretending to abide by her request. 

They'd not let her deceive them. Not them. Not after Vergo.

_ "Tashigi, I’ll let you decide what’s justice. I know this fucking woman is up to something. I'll try to evacuate as many islanders and sailors as I can." _

_ "Yes, sir!" _

She was running at full speed in direction of some suspicious explosions happening in the middle of the island. She knew they'd be there and had to reach them as fast as she could. They had no idea what was happening and what was coming for them. It was an ambush and she was scared. Buster Calls are not something to be taken lightly — it's one of the cruelest weapons at disposal of the Navy. It's inhumane, and she was sure that many other Vice-Admirals wouldn’t hesitate to use it just like Azumu decided to do. Tashigi felt a strong fear crawling up under her skin, freezing her insides, and pounding her heart like crazy.

Around her, it seemed like a weird war was happening full steam — dead people on the ground, sailors fighting against this odd tyranny and its members, children crying and civilians running. The sound of bullets and the screams were upsetting her stomach, making her want to throw up, but she couldn’t, under any circumstances, stop running.

_ My justice… if I’m running like this, then my justice favors them? _

Tashigi was almost there, she could already hear their voices, their shouts, the sound of the battle and the punches Luffy was throwing at a very tall man with broad shoulders. For some reason, only the Captain of the Strawhats was fighting — the others were all over the floor, even Zoro and Sanji. Tashigi squinted, feeling something really strange in the air.  _ Why are they just watching? _

She could hear Nami calling out for Luffy and Sanji cursing about his inability to do something; Zoro and Brook had their swords away from them, Jinbe and Robin seemed to be unconscious, Chopper was trying to reach for Usopp who seemed pretty beat up laying next to Franky.

_ What happened here? Why aren't you guys fighting? _

She was almost close, Tashigi was almost sure that they would be able to hear her if she screamed. The swordswoman still didn't understand why the crew was not fighting and protecting their Captain, but when she saw small grasping roots around their wrists, legs, and torso, she got it.  _ Vice-Admiral Azumu. _

Tashigi had been so frightened that she didn't realize the strange and sparse walls full of plants and vines around them, covering almost all the scenery. She had tunneled her vision because of her despair in finding them as soon as possible that she missed the clear indication of the Vice-Admiral presence.

_ Maze Maze no Mi. _

The core of Azumu's fruit was the ability of creating a maze of variable size made of plants. It seemed silly the first time she heard about this because Tashigi thought it could be kind of useful, but, at the same time, it could also be useless. To create a maze to fight a single opponent? If she wanted to strike a huge number of opponents, then yes, it could be really effective. 

However, back in the days, Tashigi didn't think it was a good power — too difficult to find usage and perhaps too difficult to master it. But not to Azumu. Never to her. The woman's greed had no limits, and she did master it. She found a way to use it and to make it deadly.

Vice-Admiral Azumu could control and create any dangerous plants or roots inside the maze and control them from afar. She could hide in the shadows of the maze and appear at any spot she desires. Her body could dissolve inside the walls covered in plants so she could protect herself. The marine could create as many huge walls as she wanted and change their positions so people would be left to rot inside without any chance of escaping. And one of the worst parts was the small plants that would grow inside — highly poisonous, able to create illusions, deliriums, and death as a consequence.

And now Tashigi didn't know how one could defeat this ability that easily.  _ She _ probably was the key to destroy the maze, but she could be anywhere. The Captain didn’t know if the Strawhats already found out about the magnitude of her skills, but she knew those walls were not only for decoration.  _ They probably did and now she is somewhere, lurking in the shadows. _

Sure enough, the Vice-Admiral was there, only watching them, completely swallowed by the plants and waiting for the exact moment in which her attack would hurt the most. The woman had not seen Tashigi yet, and she tried to speed up, so she could catch them and stop Azumu from creating the whole maze. 

The Captain just had to fight the exact amount to just chase the Vice-Admiral and the man away so she could extract the Strawhats from that island. Before everything ends, before the island is taken completely by the flames. That's all she needed to do.  _ No jumping into a fight without thinking it through, Tashigi. _

If she could cut Azumu quickly in the wall and use the kairouseki handcuffs she brought with her, this could end quickly.  _ You're not here to prove yourself. You're here to get them to safety! _

She was really close now, but the sound of the war was still drumming in her head and thundering in her heart, and Tashigi couldn’t see their faces since they had their back to her, but she knew they were going through the same — chaos around, their Captain fighting alone, and they could only watch. She had to step in and help them. Each step made her body shiver, and she couldn’t distinguish if it was from fear or anticipation. 

But Tashigi was a few seconds late — the Vice-Admiral had already jumped off the wall and was leaping straight in Zoro's direction. Tashigi watched everything unravel in slow motion, like a movie passing before her eyes. A movie she knew how would turn out even before it came to its end. Azumu jumped like a panther, silent as the animal when it hunts, and with her sword pointed firmly to Zoro's back. 

_ It's going to pierce through him! Roronoa, look back! She's gonna kill you!! Please, look!! _

Tashigi has never wanted to be a telepath so much in her life as she did right now. But no reason to dwell on that, she wasn’t one, and she could only count on her swords and her own body. So she did not think anymore — even the plea that came out of her mouth didn’t seem like something she'd do. However, she did it anyway. She screamed his name, and something inside her took over, moved her legs with her impressive speed due to her constant tireless and painful training, controlled her strong and firm arms, and made her just act on instinct. 

"ZORO!!!!"

_ Please, heart, arms, legs, and spirit, do not fail me. _

For only just a second that felt like minutes, Tashigi emptied her mind from anything, thought or feeling, that could distract her.  _ My willpower is bigger _ . She took a deep breath once, and all the air filled her lungs. It seemed to calm her fears and doubts, the heart returned to a normal beating, all of her five senses seemed to kick in at full speed.

She started to hear a weird noise, something like a radio with interference whispering in her ear; could distinctly taste the iron of her own blood in her mouth from biting her lips so hard; her pupils dilated, and she could still see any movement as if everything was in slow motion; her keen sense of smell made her perceive the characteristic smell of rain (a storm might be coming), and her callused hands stuck on the sword's sheath could feel the circular patterns and the rough material.

_ My willpower is greater than the pain. My willpower is everything! _

And as if time passed slowly by, Tashigi felt something very strong fill her heart, run through her blood and her veins until she felt a tingle in her hand. All the courage she had, all the determination to protect, and all her willpower were  _ literally _ in her hands. Then, slowly, the dark color that covered them extended through the sheaths and spread through the two blades.  _ Armament Haki _ .

_ I will protect! _

The impact of Azumu's swords clashing with Shigure and Yamaoroshi was strong, and it reverberated through all her body — from the fingers on her hands, covered in her usual pink gloves, to her toes. Her arms trembled with the shock, but she would not back down.  _ Endure the pain. The pain is common, it goes away. _ She would take it without a single complaint, the same way she did so many times before.

_ The pain is nothing. My willpower is greater than my pain. My desire to protect is greater than my pain. _

Tashigi and Vice-Admiral Azumu crashed, and the loud sound it made could tell her how strong it was. Strong enough for the swordswoman to be forced to stick her feet on the ground with all the strength she could muster and for the ground to break soon after.

"G-Glasses…" Zoro muttered.

"T-Tashigi-chan!?" Nami and Sanji screamed.

However, the Captain couldn’t pay them attention. Because if she did, she'd be a dead woman — Azumu always acted like a predator, and right now Tashigi was her prey. The swordswoman couldn’t afford to tear her eyes from the beast of bright blue eyes and bright red hair in front of her. 

"Forgive me, Vice-Admiral, but I can’t let you do this," Tashigi said with such a raspy voice that she almost didn’t recognize herself. But that meant she was not playing around, and Tashigi wanted the woman to understand that. Something was bubbling inside her, and she knew what it was, she just hoped it didn’t come to light.

"Haa… and you're gonna disobey the direct orders from a superior, Captain?" Azumu shot her a devilish smile that never failed to make shivers run down Tashigi's spine. But not today. Not now. Now, the swordswoman was something else.

"I can't let you take these pirates."

"Ohhh, honeybun… this can cause you serious problems," the woman licked her lips, and her eyes told Tashigi that she'd be the one to cause them.

"Just like what happened with Vergo? Or better, what  _ did not _ happen with him?" Tashigi tilted her head and squinted. 

"I think you should watch your mouth before you lose that sharp tongue of yours, my dear…"

The woman looked like the devil, and Tashigi was facing it without blinking. Hell was close, and she could feel it.  _ Well, might as well burn already. _

"Forgive me, Vice-Admiral, but I can't."

The swords were shaking with the force both of the women were applying. Tashigi knew that, if she caved in, the other wouldn’t hesitate to give her a very finishing blow. The Captain's arms were trembling, and the pain was sharp. Even with armament haki, the strength of the other woman was impressive. If she made a wrong movement, hell would be coming to take her sooner than she thought. 

"Then death is your choice?" Azumu asked with a dangerous glint in her eyes.

Tashigi knew what she had to do, she had already came prepared, already thought of a strategy before jumping into the fight with the devil. Even if she didn't succeed in defeating her — Azumu was a Vice-Admiral after all — her main goal was to evacuate the island and take the Strawhats to safety. She had to buy time.  _ That's all, Tashigi. Focus on buying time! _

"So be it then. I'm not afraid of dying. But don't underestimate me, Vice-Admiral, because I…" 

Tashigi took advantage of their small dialogue and surprised her with a headbutt. Simple as that. Simple enough to stun the opponent and create an opening. The sound was so strong that the Captain almost believed she had broken her head.

"I WON'T LET…" 

Vice-Admiral Azumu stumbled and, with widened eyes, put her hand on her forehead, in the exact spot Tashigi had just hit. But the Captain would not let the woman have the time to counterattack — she launched herself towards the other woman with lightning speed, hands firmly holding Shigure and Yamaoroshi.

"...YOU…"

Tashigi saw the surprise on the Vice Admiral's face and understood where it came from — nobody ever expected that the innocent and kind Captain Tashigi would be able to fight tooth and nail. But after so many disappointments, the swordswoman started to rejoice at the faces of amazement towards her. She turned Shigure on the right angle and, with all the agility she possessed in her body, started to unleash a flurry of blows from several directions along with Yamaoroshi, launching the other woman into the air.

_ Ranga Chō! _

"...TAKE THE STRAWHATS!!!" 

The Vice-Admiral rose and fell with the maximum force that gravity could provide. The thud was violent, and the woman sank to the ground, breaking it and creating a pile of debris. It was the new opening she needed to protect the crew behind her. Tashigi ran towards them again, knowing that the time window until the Vice-Admiral stood on her feet again would be considerably small.

Tashigi cut all the roots that were binding them to the ground and screamed, "Go!"

Sanji got up and massaged his wrist and then with all concern in his voice said, "But Tashigi-chan, you—"

"GO! You guys don't have much time! They set you guys up, the Navy already gave the permission for the units around this island to trigger the Buster Call!" she said with desperation in her voice.

"What?! Buster Call?!?" Chopper screamed with terror.

"No… this… this can't be…" Robin seemed scared, and her eyes were pleading to know the reason.

"You all need to find Smoker-san and get out of here!! He's on the edge of the island evacuating civilians and sailors, he'll try to use his powers to stop it! You need to help him!"

It seemed like madness, but, if she thought about it, they had managed to invade Enies Lobby and survive a Buster Call once. She knew they were exceptional, she knew they could help stop this. Besides, it was only now she realized Trafalgar Law was with them, which, in all honesty, was good. Tashigi hated the man but could not turn the blind eye to his strength.

"Guys, where's Luffy?!" Nami asked with a slight panic in her voice. 

Tashigi and the others looked around and couldn’t find the rubber boy. The Captain realized the floor was starting to be covered by plants and roots, which only meant the Vice-Admiral was almost getting back on her feet. She wanted to trap them inside, so they couldn’t escape and would perish with the explosions.

_ Damn it, where's that goddamn monkey?!  _

"Look for your Captain and get him out of here! Meet the G-5 and help them and Smoker-san! Go, go!" she tried to shoo them away, but, God, how stubborn they were.

"We're not leaving you here, Tashigi!" Usopp's voice seemed very brave, but she could see he had his knees shaking violently. If this was in other circumstances, she'd be laughing at him. 

"Don't worry about me, just go!" Tashigi begged for them to listen to her, while she kept looking behind her back desperately. 

"Oi woman, why the hell did you do that?! You didn't need to protect me—"

_ The nerve of this man to fight me right here and now because I protected him. So much contempt for me. _

"Shut up, Roronoa. It was just a reflex."

Zoro opened his mouth slightly and maybe he would say something, maybe he would thank her or scold her, but she would never know now. Her heart was beating frantically with anticipation and anxiety until it froze completely when she heard the sound of rubbles being lifted. Obviously the woman would not be defeated with a single blow — maybe Zoro would be the one to achieve this feat or not even he would be able to do it — but she just wanted to buy time anyway. 

Tashigi yelled urgently again, "GO!"

She turned her back to them, trusting they would leave to safety. The Vice Admiral's face was showing raw fury and Tashigi felt the storm inside her.  _ She is strong like Vergo. Or even stronger. I don't know if I'm a match, but I need to hold my position. If this will be my death, then I must make it worth something. _

Tashigi heard the rustle of clothes and the sound of feet running across the floor.  _ Good, they'll be safe _ . She wielded both swords defensively and decided to observe.  _ Make your move, Vice Admiral. _ The swordswoman narrowed her eyes and drowned out any other distractions of the world.  _ Focus. Position yourself. Breathe. _

Once again, her vision focused and nothing went unnoticed by her — a single leaf would fall to her left in ten seconds, the wind would blow the dust from the rubble from left to right, the Vice Admiral would attack from her left with a straight blow to her ribs, and Tashigi would block by turning Yamaoroshi's blade down.  _ Observation Haki. Focus. _

Her black blade found the Vice Admiral's black fist. Tashigi had used the Haki correctly, but the woman did not back down. The Captain would have to fight using both Hakis and she knew it would cost a lot of her energy.  _ Doesn’t matter. I am capable. _

Azumu dashed and engaged again, attacking with her black fists and other times with her black sword. Tashigi blocked and thrust, their blades clashed one more time — the sound loud enough to deafen any other noise of the outside world — the maze was rising, and she almost couldn’t see what was happening beyond the small walls full of plants.  _ She wants me to die here. She wants to bury any proof of what she's doing. _

The Vice-Admiral started to retreat and hide in the shadows of her plants and walls, attacking Tashigi from her blind spots, and the Captain was slowly but surely adapting her observation haki. Time and time again she dodged her attacks, stopped it with the swing of her black blades then attacked with decisive blows. 

The two women have been fighting with a lot of precaution — Tashigi taking all the care not to jump into a reckless attack, and the other woman basically just moving around her, hiding in the walls, sending roots to hit the Captain and almost not even slashing her.  _ She's not fighting me seriously. Why are you not taking me seriously?! _

And then it dawned on her that, apart from not deeming Tashigi a true opponent, Azumu was also trying to buy time. 

Yes, killing Tashigi would solve her problems, but keeping her there for as long as she could was better, it would probably give the other odd man time to hunt the Strawhats and eliminate them, stopping her and Smoker from protecting the pirates. The realization angered the Captain more than she could have imagined. The fury was definitely gonna swallow her whole because of the disregard the other woman was showing her.  _ Why? Why?! Why does everyone look down on me all the time? _

They clashed again, then parried and jumped back only to collide again, but this time the swordswoman would not let her get away that easily. Tashigi got ready to attack once more, and the Vice-Admiral mimicked her movements, but mid-run the Captain took advantage of her own impressive speed, ran by the maze wall and appeared behind of the other marine — with her hands gripping both swords hard and firm and her arms forming an impeccable X shape — struck a powerful blow that the other was not able to dodge, even though she tried to turn her sword to Tashigi.

The impact was intense, Azumu flew a few meters, hitting the wall, with a perfect X shaped wound on her chest and a strong thud.  _ Take me seriously, because I’m not letting you get away, woman.  _ Blood spluttered free from her wound, but Tashigi did not give her time to recuperate, charging at her in a lightning speed, ready to swing Shigure to her left and Yamaoroshi to the right in a precise cut.

Azumu grimaced and blocked the Captain’s attack, angling her sword horizontally, one hand holding firmly on the blade and the other on the handle to protect herself. It was strong enough to create sparks and encourage Tashigi.

Tashigi pressed with more force and the Vice-Admiral smirked, “I see you’re not joking around, Captain. Who would have thought that cutie Captain Tashigi would fight so fiercely for the sake of a bunch of fucking pirates scum?”

“They’re not scum! If anything, what you’re doing here is the disgraceful attitude!” Tashigi spat at her face, grinding her teeth and growling. She could feel the anger in the tips of her hands starting to numb her mind.  _ Not now, not now. Control yourself, Tashigi. _

"C'mon, Captain, you should stop while you can," the Vice-Admiral said in a mocking tone, "You know you don't have even the slight chance of defeating me."

Tashigi pushed harder, but the woman was, somehow, slowly fading. She widened her eyes and watched Azumu being swallowed by the wall of her maze.  _ Shit, shit, shit.  _ The Captain still tried to strike her with a swing of Shigure, but it was too late — the Vice-Admiral was already inside her own territory.

She could hear the other woman’s voice echoing through the walls, but couldn’t pinpoint exactly where it was coming from. Tashigi felt like her voice was everywhere around her, in every wall, echoing in her mind like she was right behind her. And the strange fear under her skin showed itself again.

“You’re here fighting me because you want to protect that little pirate boyfriend of yours, right?” the voice of the woman seemed to echo on Tashigi’s right, but a very sharp root attacked her from the left, slashing her flesh, tearing her attention from the wall and stopping her from predicting the charge from the Vice-Admiral. 

Another slash on her right, and Tashigi was too slow to dodge. A cut on her left arm and a deep gash on her right side.  _ Stop being so careless! Focus! _

Azumu merged with the wall again, and her mockery continued, “I saw the way you screamed his name and the despair in your eyes, sweetie. Are you in love with him, Captain?”

_ Unfortunately, I am _ .

The sound was still echoing on the walls, the devil fruit user presence everywhere, the walls were growing vertically at every passing minute, and suddenly everything was too much.  _ You need to calm down. Don’t let her get the best of you. _ Tashigi adjusted her feet, readjusted the grip on the swords, and focused solely on finding the trace of her opponent.  _ She’s here, I can feel her. She will show up. Find the true thread of her presence. _

Tashigi closed her eyes and decided to sheathe Yamaoroshi and hold only Shigure in one hand. She knew the woman would find it a cocky attitude of her. “Oooh, do you think you’re that good that only one sword will do the job?”

_ I have to stop doubting myself and my blows. No self-doubt now. _

“Let’s see if you’re that good, honey.”

The time seemed to pass slowly, and she could hear the rustle of the leaves on the maze; maybe it was the woman moving inside it. She changed to a wall at her right, then at her left and at her back, bouncing up and down trying to dull Tashigi’s senses.  _ No self-doubt.  _ The Captain waited for her enemy to make a move again.

Then, when the world around her became blurred, she was able to distinguish the contour of the Vice-Admiral’s body coming from her left at full speed. Tashigi inhaled once, changed the position of Shigure to her left hand, the point of the blade turned to her back, the back of the sword fitting on the length of her arm, her eyes still closed. 

Tashigi was sure the Vice-Admiral thought she had dropped her guard, underestimating her once again, only to emerge from the wall and run into her sword, a cocky grin on her mouth becoming one of pain as Tashigi’s counterattack sank in. 

The moment she had blocked her opponent’s blow was also the moment she unsheathed Yamaoroshi in a fast movement of a precise horizontal cut right in the Vice-Admiral’s abdomen.  _ He did say my technique of sheathing and unsheathing was fast after all. _

The moment she landed the blow, Tashigi knew it had been deep. She had heard the sound of the blade cutting and how it slid on the flesh of her opponent like a hot knife through butter. 

Blood spilled from the woman’s wound and mouth, but, as she wasn’t one to be outdone, she summoned roots that locked the Captain on the ground when two others pierced her left shoulder and her right thigh. It was enough for Tashigi to fall to her knees and exhale a sharp cry of pain. 

Another root pierced her arm before Azumu disappeared again inside her plant wall, screaming and cursing, “YOU LITTLE BITCH, HOW DARE YOU?!”

Even with the pain, the swordswoman was still able to smirk because she knew that blow had been strong enough and the woman must be feeling a lot of pain too. Tashigi spat the blood, the taste and smell of iron everywhere, and sneered, “You were the one who was too conceited, Vice-Admiral.”

All of a sudden, the walls started moving, and Tashigi realized the woman was changing the layout, probably trying to prevent her and whoever was trapped inside from escaping. Now the swordswoman really couldn’t hear anything of the world outside, and she just hoped, from the bottom of her heart, that the others were already safe. 

But she was still there, Tashigi knew it. Azumu probably was just hiding to mend her wounds, and the Captain berated herself for not putting more power into that strike. If she had done that, the woman would have fainted and the maze would be undone. 

“You pissed me a lot now, you little whore,” the woman growled from inside the moving and growing walls, “I’ll trap you in this place and be off to slit the throat of your little boyfriend, what do you think?”

Tashigi gaped and widened her eyes.  _ What? What is she talking about? _

“Aaahhh, yes, yes. He and his Captain are still trapped here inside. How should I kill him? Cut him with his own swords? Make him fight his Captain?” More plants followed Tashigi while she tried to avoid the walls closing in on her. Her head was spinning, and she couldn’t stop thinking about Azumu’s words. She said only Zoro and Luffy’s names, so the others might have escaped. And if they did, Tashigi hoped they were already fighting alongside Smoker. 

Well, Luffy was understandable to be stuck inside this small hell, but Zoro? Did he seriously got lost? 

_ A maze. What an irony. Just as I said a while ago that he would die if someone threw him in one. Ugh, this stupid man. _

Now she had to find a way to save the damned pirate again, find Luffy, and get them out of there. 

She kept running all the while dodging from the sharp roots dashing at her, stepping in the wall and cutting all of them in swift movements, leaping back and slashing, with the urgency and despair she was feeling. Sweat was dripping off her face, and the injuries from before were still opened and hurting, but the Vice-Admiral was not giving her time to recover.

“How should I, how should I, Captain Tashigi? Open that scar he has on his chest?” Another attack from the sides, and she ducked, the roots reaching the opposite walls. “Make him hallucinate with his crewmates trying to kill him?”

This time it was Azumu herself that emerged from the ground, but Tashigi was fast enough to jump before the woman's sword reached her. Heart drumming in her chest, she decided to take the chance — Tashigi dived in again, swinging her blade, trying to slash, but her opponent dodged. Tashigi took advantage of the momentum and stuck Yamaoroshi and Shigure on the ground, one palm flat on the pommel of one sword, spinning her body in a circular movement to land a strong kick right on the still opened wound in the other woman's abdomen. 

It worked because Azumu staggered, blood flowing free from the wound, staining her white clothes. She was panting, and her beautiful face twisted in anger, however, the Vice-Admiral was relentless. Even being painfully hurt and using haki, she still had energy enough to lunge, cut and thrust at Tashigi without stopping, driving her closer and closer to the walls, never letting her gain her balance.

Tashigi was starting to feel tired from so much usage of haki, the old wounds, and the new ones while Azumu was launching herself and the roots all at once onto her. The Captain parried fiercely, coating her swords with armament haki, and tried to counter, but the other devilish woman was pressing without yielding, never giving up the initiative.

"So what do you think, Captain? How should I kill him?” A thrust. “It’s your job too, you know?” A side cut on Tashigi’s arm. “You should be locking them in jail and not helping them escape.”

Tashigi parried with all her strength, but Azumu was surely outdoing her. Her drained energy prevented her from evading an obvious sweep kick, making her almost trip, but at the very moment, the sadist shoved her to the wall and pinned her with her small plants. 

Azumu sheathed her own sword, and her face was full of blood, much like Tashigi’s too, but she had a ruthless smile.  _ This woman is brutal and fiendish. I have to run and put distance between us. _

Her pupils were completely dilated, and Tashigi tried to get a better grip on both of her swords. Azumu didn’t let her, sticking a finger on the bleeding wound on Tashigi’s shoulder and pressing, making the swordswoman scream and drop her swords to the ground. 

“What do you think, Tashigi? Should I torture you too?” the Vice-Admiral pulled a knife and, without ceremonies, stuck right in the Captain’s ribs, winning a sharp cry from her.  _ Damn, damn, hold on, Tashigi! Try to focus again and coat yourself with haki. Hold on! _

“He’s basically under an illusion, did you know that? There’s a bunch of mirages there, also tormenting him,” Azumu was really close to her face, raising a hand to stab her once more, “He screamed for someone… should I make Kuina kill him, Tashigi?”

Tashigi’s whole body entered the alert mode, and the anger she was trying to contain seemed to flow through her veins, bubbling her insides and burning her flesh. But somehow, it also helped her concentrate and use the rest of her energy to harden her skin and soul. Azumu lowered her hand for the stab only to find her ribs in complete black color. 

“What did you just say!?” Tashigi growled and grasped the plants, gaining the momentum to kick the woman once again. Azumu landed on her back, clutching her stomach, and Tashigi pulled her hand, scratching the skin on her wrists and drawing blood, but she just didn’t care. “How dare you? How dare you play with people like that?”

She grabbed her swords and launched herself forward, with fury in her eyes and violence in her hands, clashing with the woman once again, black blades against another, firing repetitive slashes, cutting Azumu’s skin, pushing her to the maze wall and breaking it soon after. 

“How dare you? HOW DARE YOU PLAY WITH HIM LIKE THAT?”

_ Violence. Violence runs through me again. _

It was a thick wall and one that could heal fast, but Tashigi went through it, following the other woman that had disappeared again. “SHOW YOURSELF, AZUMU! I’M DONE PLAYING AROUND!” the Captain howled loud enough to create an echo inside the maze. “I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME, COME AND FINISH THIS!”

Tashigi was losing her sanity by the second, and she knew what would happen if she didn't end that soon. Violence consumed her bones once and will consume it again. Her swords still painted black, she decided to just cut through the walls to maybe draw the other woman again. “SHOW YOURSELF, YOU DAMN WOMAN! SHOW YOURSELF, AND I’M GONNA CUT YOU IN HALF!”

Flowers appeared on the floor, encircling her and trying to immobilizing her, but she was able to cut through it, while keeping her attention around, but then the walls were changing again, and now she found herself in a more open space with a presence she knew, but couldn’t see anything because of the thick mist that appeared all of a sudden. Azumu was trying to numb her senses again, but Tashigi would not let her guard down. 

The Captain fumbled, trying to find some support on the walls, but couldn’t find any pattern to guide her. Her anger had not subsided, but with every tick of the clock, she was beginning to feel more and more anxious. Then she felt it — the murderous intent of the Vice-Admiral behind her. Tashigi knew she was coming for the kill, she felt it with the crawl of her skin. 

Before she even had the chance to turn around, a gust of wind that turned into a tornado put an end to Azumu’s attack. It was huge and strong and was able to disperse the mist entirely. She knew that power and force, she already had seen that ability.

_ Tatsumaki! _

Tashigi looked around to see Roronoa Zoro, full of bruises and blood, with his three swords unsheathed. Her heart was about to burst from her ribcage with the relief to see him alive in the best way possible in that situation.

Azumu had been thrown meters away from them, but her quiet and treacherous voice still vibrated in the small space.

“Ooh, you got free from my illusions, then…” her laugh was poisonous, and her voice drawled, punctuating every word with her evil tone, “So he finally arrives, the swordsman who hates those who hurt women. How cute.”

Tashigi looked at his eye, and he scanned her face and body, with annoyance, as if asking  _ “She did this to you?” _ , and the Captain only nodded in confirmation. He frowned, his lips trembled, and his eye did not betray the anger he was feeling. 

Zoro was panting, when he decided to speak, but still answered in his usual cold blood voice, “Yeah, I don’t like it. Especially this one.”

Tashigi knew that tone and that look.

_ A storm is coming. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really want to thank everyone that follows this story, you know? Love you all. 
> 
> And Tashigi being violent when she explodes? Yeah, count me in. By the way, if there’s already a canon character with this ability, then just pretend there isn’t, please. I had to create an original character and that’s the ability I came up with.
> 
> I apologize again for our pretty boy only showing up in the end and the chapter full of fighting scenes, I swear it’ll make sense.
> 
> (Big big big hug for mah girls in the ZoTash discord btw)
> 
>  **EDIT:** reposted and this is the version with the fixes suggested by the amazing [nntssy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nntssy/pseuds/nntssy)! Thank you, dear! :*

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not an expert, but I'm trying! I want it to be a multichapter but not too long. Thank you for reading!


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